Chances are, you're familiar with the rite of passage that is the drunk dial. Once you've hit the bottle a little too hard, you have no choice but to pick up your phone and call inappropriate audiences. Another substance-related rite of passage, it seems, is the inappropriate behavior after wisdom tooth surgery.
Anesthesia and painkillers certainly work some magic on us mere mortals — we can't help but think we're celebrities or sing wildly offensive songs.... Or send unusual emails? College student Abby Jo Hamele is officially joining the club of people with embarrassing /epic post-surgery tales.
The 19-year-old undergraduate at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln required "a lot of hydrocodone" whilst recovering from surgery — and it had some side effects. For example, she confused her current dog for her former dog who passed away... And things got sad.
my dog Daisy is on her and she thought is was our old dog Sammy that passed away and... pic.twitter.com/4kPJkWGlsf— mary cate (@marycatehamele) November 22, 2016
But tears were not the only byproduct of her altered state. Hamele, still under the influence, emailed her philosophy 101 teaching assistant, Kevin Patton, asking for an extension for a nonexistent deadline.
I EMAILED MY PHILOSOPHY TA WHILE I WAS HIGH ON HYDROCODON I'M DEAD pic.twitter.com/ncJ8XX4zoe— Abby Jo Hamele (@jabbyo3) November 21, 2016
She has no memory of sending the hilarious email.
The full, drugged-up, misspelled note reads:
I believe that i relmebmer you said we, as us students, would be able to send you our papers for classss for you to look at over before we turn them in to cColin if we got them to you by the 22nd of Novermber.
I unfortmately got my wisdom teeth sliced outr and have not not been reacting very well to the surgeryy nor the medicatioon i were given/ so I do not thimk that I will be able to habe my paper finisherd by Tuesday at all.
Is tehere any way I would be able to send you my paper at any later date??? I wnt to do very good on this paper you know becayse i like to do well in my classes.
please sir I workled very hard and thouught that I would be abel to finish it on timme but my doctor said I will most likelly not be normal again until at least Thanksginvg turkey. If you say no then that is okay but i would be sad and i would reallyyyy lik e it if you said yes. Thank you Kevin, my dude.
Abby Jo Hamele (pronounced hah-mil-lee) (if you were wondering)
P.S. I will answer youpr questions in class forever so theere are not any more awkard silence. and i will buy you expo markers that work (even thougjh our tuition should pay for markers that work)
love you bye
Hamele's hilarious and epic email won her over 15,000 retweets within 10 days.
@jabbyo3 HAHAAHAHA OMG IM CRYING— Annette Sutcliffe (@hiimannette) November 22, 2016
@jabbyo3 I have never been so proud of you "my dude"— Abbey Patera (@abbeypatera) November 21, 2016
@jabbyo3 THIS IS SO ICONIC LMAO— rach ;) (@cliffordfringex) November 23, 2016
This kind of glorious writing doesn't go unnoticed by Twitter.
Fans even took the liberty of pointing out their favorite lines of the email.
@jabbyo3 "I will most likely not be normal again until thanksgiving turkey"— Abbey Patera (@abbeypatera) November 21, 2016
@jabbyo3 "Thank you Kevin, my dude"— lish (@alisha_roarty) November 21, 2016
@jabbyo3 "we, as us students"— Angie (@angela_en) November 21, 2016
@jabbyo3 "love you bye" ☠️?— Stephanie Graham (@StephGraham96) November 21, 2016
TBH, she had some people wondering where they could get whatever she was taking that inspired this creative work.
@art_abstraction i wish to be this high one day— shiho @ Alola (@shewhoran) November 23, 2016
Best of all her dude Kevin the TA responded — and had a good sense of humor about it.
If you're going to deal with college students and their papers, you kind of have to expect a mishap or two due to substances, right?
...And Twitter, of course, gave Kevin some credit for being the best TA.
@jabbyo3 That's some good TA'ing Kevin my dude.— Marissa (@standardtuber) November 23, 2016
Perhaps he's had some wisdom teeth-related mishaps of his own? They happen to the best of us. (h/t buzzfeed)