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This Instagram Lists All The Reasons People's Relationships Ended

If there's one thing that humans have proven in the annals of dating history is that we have a long and storied career of messing it up.

Chalk it up to being nervous, getting too comfortable, terrible first impressions, being too open, being too secretive, or trying to just be someone you're not - there's a slew of reasons for romantic relationships not going the distance.

And although matters of the heart are extremely trying for the parties involved, that doesn't mean other people can't find them humorous. Something that the Instagram account, Reasons We're Not Dating, highlights.

The posts sometimes come with mini stories that provide a bit more context as to why a particular relationship ended.

Or relationships that never began in the first place.

Some of them are a bit more disturbing than others.

While others were just classic tales of miscommunication and being too earnest.

This was Crispin. Crispin was someone I knew when I was a child. We reconnected at a reunion when we were teenagers. He contacted me after and we started to hang out. I thought it was great because he was really generous and kept taking me for meals and buying takeaways then we would watch cool films together. One night I was sitting watching a film with him and he started stroking my leg and back. It was then I came to the chilling realisation that we had been dating this whole time. I immediately panicked and texted my friend to pick me up. As I left he went in for the kiss. I gave him my cheek. He was persistent and went in again. I gave him my other cheek. He tried a third time. I grabbed him in a hug and ran away. We never spoke again. #ithoughthewasagenerousfriend #notouchingplease #clueless #friendzone

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Some aren't really that funny at all.

But comedy's a lot like garbage: one person's trash is another's treasure. And I can't help but laugh at some of these.

This was Cameron. Let’s call him Cam. Cam and I met on holiday, he was the manager of the resort we were staying at. I ended up making out with him at the club in the early hours. We were both quite drunk and he invited me back to his. When we got there I was shocked at how messy it was and the Monica inside me just wanted to clean the whole place up. To distract myself from this I thought we should just get on with things. Then he asked me if I brought lube. Like yeah, sorry let me just get that out of my bag.. when I’m on holiday and you’ve invited me back to yours. 🤔 Soz Cam hun, you killed the mood. #lube #whatdoyouthinkagirltakesonholiday #travelsize #sozhun #dryasabone P.S. the sexiest thing about this encounter was when he told me he could lose his job for fraternising with a guest. #allthepower

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This one is pretty self explanatory... #racetothefinish #2minuteman #datingfail

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This was Norris. I'm not sure what to say about Norris. We worked together and he was pretty nice but I didn't feel a spark, he was kind of pursuing things anyway though. One day he came up to me with a bit of gossip and opened with, "I heard some news on the great vine". I can't remember anything about what happened after because I couldn't stop thinking about the mythical massive vine that gossip drops off of. I wondered what Marvin Gaye would think. I wondered what Norris sang when Heard It Through The Grapevine came on. I wondered a lot of things... except whatever Norris came over to tell me. #thatsnothowitgoes #hearditthroughthegrapevine #marvingaye #nameshavebeenchanged #reasonswerenotdating

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The last one is probably the craziest, I mean, Jon Snow anyone? Hello?!

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