My life has been a lie. After Game 1 of the NBA Finals, Kevin Hart and Jay Z met court side to talk about the game and have their picture taken. Shattering the reality I've become accustomed to, Jay Z, laughing at literally nothing, told the photographer to "take the picture while we're talking."
Jay Z literally got that Old Rich Billionaire laugh pic.twitter.com/ohs8qDsqpx— DJ Akademiks (@IamAkademiks) June 2, 2017
The most horrible part of all of this? Jay Z's plan worked. The picture looks amazing. If I hadn't seen the video, I would have thought Kevin Hart had just told a hilarious Kevin Hart joke and Jay Z was so happy and amused he could help but laugh like a little angel. But now I know the truth - IT'S ALL A LIE. A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE LIE. I'LL NEVER RECOVER.
Growing up as a Muslim-Albanian family with very patriarchal ideas on the way a family is supposed to operate, my idea of what a father should be was a very "man's man" one.
He brings home the bacon, laughs maybe five times a year, and was really into Clint Eastwood and Martin Scorcese movies. Oh, and a Marlboro Red had to be perpetually hanging out the side of his mouth.
Fast forward years later and here I am, dadding it up, and I'm not that, like, at all. The manliest thing I probably do is hit the gym, bro, and not shave my chest hair. Other than that though, I'm nothing like the former generation of "guy's guys" that raised me. Which I'm totally cool with, because I'm already learning special hair braids to try out on my daughter once she gets older. Because her old man might be a North Jersey meathead, but he's going to be a meathead who doesn't mind having tea parties and getting his nails painted with his little girl.