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Much of the talk in Washington D.C. has been of Fire and Fury, Michael Wolff's tell-all book from within the walls of the Trump White House. One of the book's most significant claims is that many of Trump's closest staff believe his mental acuity is slipping. As he said on CNN, "You cannot listen to this man talk without at least contemplating the possibility that something is grievously amiss."
Michael also believes the the 25th amendment — which allows 14 specific people to remove a sitting president from office — is unavoidable. "Because it's completely alarming. The guy can't go put one coherent sentence after another," he added. "He's off, he can't stay on subject, he can't stay on point — and then you come back to the same off-point thing he said five minutes ago, he's now saying it again."
We didn't have to. wait long for Trump to respond to the author's claims about this mental capacity — and he did so on his favorite social media platform, Twitter, for all to read. In response, the President tweeted the following:
....Actually, throughout my life, my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart. Crooked Hillary Clinton also played these cards very hard and, as everyone knows, went down in flames. I went from VERY successful businessman, to top T.V. Star.....
Congratulations, sir! This dignified, statesman-like tweet is the perfect way to counter the book's narrative that you're an impulsive, childish dimwit. https://t.co/VW1uzqu5pr
One tweet stood out. @hunttheshark knew exactly what Twitter needed — Gilbert and Sullivan references:
I am the very model of a Very Stable Genius. I have a mighty button and no problems with my penius. I have no time for television, golf, or social media Since my brain is way way better than the best encyclopedia.
In fact, they enjoyed the song so much, they couldn't help but join in for a second verse:
I like to tweet the lies of racist grievances historical When Russian ties are mentioned I deny them categorical I do not feel the sting of words because I am avenious I am the very model of a Very Stable Genius!
— C. B. Wright (A Madman Unhing'd) (@ubersoft) January 6, 2018
And the song wasn't over yet...
I am the very model of a man who is, like, very smart..... Many people see my brain and say it's like a work of art..... My daddy, he did nuclear; he truly knew things myriad..... And when I type ellipsis I use far too many periods.....
I am the leading expert on all matters constitutional, executive and legislative and the courts marsupial, I love to grab the labius, suspend the corpus habeas, And if you should impeach me I am still a #stablegenius
I'm very well aquainted, too, with matters economical, I understand the 1% must have tax that is nominal, About two-state solutions I am teeming with a lot 'o nukes (a lot o' nukes) And all the generals crap their pants and wonder if we need a coup.
I like to say I’m smart because it makes me feel superior but all my words and phrases seem to come from my posterior I swear I have no problems either physical or medical I am the very model of a modern major genital
An amateur's addition: My toadies all look up to me, in worship they're obsequious My MAGA hordes adore my mane and praise my bigly prescience They care not that I slander, lie, defame or that I’m odious A genius I’m not, I am a traitor quite felonious
I'm very well acquainted too with matters immigrational My genitals are massive and my hairpiece is sensational My tiny hands are frozen, I will warm them with a grabby feel (grabby feel..grabby feel..Ah! I have it!) And fill my greasy mouth with yet another Mackie's Happy Meal
Twitter seemed to have a lot of feelings they needed to get off their chest through song:
I have around me sycophants And a modern major general On the pot, at night I tweet With logic that's ephemeral I get to skate on crimes that Others normally find hein-ious I am the very model of a Very Stable Genious
When I became the President it wasn't what I meant to do. I wanted to enjoy the fame and maybe make a mill or two. I went to all the rallies which felt like a public pillory And tried intimidating the appalling Crooked Hilary!
My hands, they gesture swiftly to obscure my digits minuscule. I’ll whine an edict, sign a law, and brag how I was smart in school. Aesthetically, I fancy colors gilded and adorned in golds. In bed I lay while dripping burger sauce into my belly folds.
Nice! Ok I'll bite: "Each evening I tune into my big screen televisions (three!) / I curse those louts on CNN and writers of the NYT / They cast aspersions on my name and those of all my relatives / I block them out with folders full of praise and facts alternative!"
Tune in tomorrow for new verses inspired by whatever Trump does today.
I am large and I am orange and my hair is all original. I have no time for anyone who is vaguely aboriginal. My enemies are guilty, all, of crimes most dark and heinous. I am the very model of a Very Stable Genuous.
