I have never been fired from a job. Is it because I am a terrific employee? No. It is because I know how to hide all my fireable offenses. Here’s a tip. Hide in the bathroom. It is great for screaming, and crying, and its normal function.
Turns out though not everyone knows all the secrets to avoid getting fired and sometimes proud fools get caught. Whether it was because they were caught drinking and smoking (Instead, smoke and drink in the bathroom), or because they were caught stealing (Instead, steal from the bathroom), or because they screaming at customers (Instead, scream at people in the bathroom.)
Seriously it would have been very easy to hide these crimes but alas, hubris destroys even the laziest of employees.
1. I hear you but...
Every year during the holiday season, I’d warn the new hires, “listen, no matter how tempting it is, don’t steal a customer’s gift card. We can track it, I will track it and if I catch you, you will get fired. Every year people try it, every year people get fired. Don’t do it.” They do it anyway.