You'd have to be an awful person to lie about the gender of your baby and your due date just to get your sister off your back, right? Wrong. Sometimes family members are just so insane and overbearing that you have to lie to get them off your back. That's what's going on in this post from Reddit's "Am I the A-hole?"
In this case, the crazy relative is the one writing the post. I'm going to tell you that upfront. She writes that she's 21 years old and her sister, Rachel, who's 28, recently had her first child. OP claims it's been a "hellish nightmare for everyone" since Rachel announced she was pregnant. Get ready, folks.
When Rachel found out she was pregnant, she told everyone she wasn't going to find out the sex of her baby beforehand. Her prerogative, right? Well, this "didn't suit" any of her family members, especially her sister, the OP, who wanted to buy presents for the kid ahead of time.
She believed Rachel wouldn't actually be able to wait to find out the baby's sex, so she messaged her every single day to ask if she knew yet. I'm already exhausted with this woman. Rachel told their mom her little sister was "driving her insane with the constant asking," which, yeah, makes sense.
Finally, when Rachel was 17 weeks along, she responded to OP and said she'd learned the baby's sex and that it was a girl. The sister was super excited, but Rachel said she only wanted gender-neutral gifts. Honestly, the stock we put into a newborn baby's gender is totally wrong and weird, and it should have never become a thing. It's totally reasonable Rachel would ask for only gender-neutral gifts.
Her sister wasn't having, however. She wrote, "She was extremely adamant about the gender neutral gifts so I did 80 percent neutral and just got a few pink dresses and frilly pink sleep suits as they were gorgeous." She's already making me so mad.
Now for "bomb number two," according to OP. At 36 weeks pregnant, Rachel let her family know she would be needing a C-section and only wanted her husband present at the birth with her. Reasonable, right? That's major surgery, traumatic in every way. But OP was not OK with that. She "found that incredibly insulting," asked her if she was joking, and believed she was slighted because her sister didn't want her there while she undergoes probably the biggest medical procedure of her life.
Two days later, Rachel's husband Nick called to announce the baby had been born, and that it was a boy. Rachel had never found out the baby's sex; she just told her sister it was a girl to get her off her back. And she lied about the due date because she knew her sister would show up at the hospital even after being asked not to be there.
I don't know about you, but I think Rachel was totally justified in her actions. OP has refused to see the baby. "I am distraught my niece never existed," she wrote. "I demanded that she give the gifts back as they are for a baby girl but she said no and sent me a pic of the baby in a pink frilly sleep suit!"
So yeah, Rachel is kind of my hero. OP is furious that Rachel won't pay her back and return the gifts and that she lied about the gender and the due date. She wrote, "My whole family has told me to let it go," but she just can't! So she turned to Reddit to see if she was being unreasonable.
Redditors were hilariously ruthless, and I love it. "WOW," one person wrote. "You managed to take her baby's birth and make it all about yourself. You owe her a huge apology."
"The farther I read, the more I thought OP needs to see a therapist as soon as possible. She sounds well on her way to never being allowed to see the kid," another person wrote.
"Omg I really hope this is a joke," someone else wrote. "But in case it is not: OP you are a terrible, terrible person." Someone else pointed out that in the comments, OP mentioned Rachel had been pregnant before and lost the baby at 14 weeks. This pregnancy probably worried her along the way, and the fact that her sister tortured her about it the whole time is unconscionable.
Let this be a lesson to all family members of pregnant people: Let them dictate their own pregnancies. It's their body, their family unit, their decision! The fact that some people don't fall at the feet of the pregnant person they know and offer anything they want is appalling. It's one of the hardest things a human body can go through. Treat pregnant people accordingly!
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