This Mom's Quest For Parrots Roped Her Whole Family Into A Conspiracy
By Aimee LutkinA girl named Noor has gotten Twitter super invested in a story about her mom trying to pull one over on the entire family. She writes that she got a call from her mom (from inside the house!) telling her she has a secret plan to adopt some parrots, against the wishes of literally everyone else in the house. Now, we don't understand why anyone would be against having a pet parrot — especially ones that can talk — but this mom was determined to buy the bird, no matter what her daughter or husband said. And luckily for us, it was all captured in this now viral Twitter thread.
Thread. My mum is absolutely mad. This conversation just happened over the phone. I’m in my room upstairs, and she’s downstairs.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
This is how you get sucked into things, folks. Noor's mom obviously knew she was the weak link. Once one person falls to the parrot plan, the rest are just dominoes.
It began with Noor's mom suggesting they get one parrot and keep it secretly in the house, but things quickly escalated:
She called and whispered “can you keep a secret”
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: Um... sure?
Mum: I need you to come with me to go get a parrot.
Me: What??? Mum, not again.
Mum: please just come, if you don’t, I’ll go alone
Me: YOU CAN’T HAVE A SECRET PARROT IN THE HOUSE
Mum: I CAN
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: HOW. How will you hide this parrot?
Mum: In the kitchen
Me: LITERALLY THE LEAST DISCRETE PLACE IN THE HOUSE
Mum: It could work
Me: MUM
Mum: WELL NONE OF YOU WILL LET ME HAVE CHICKENS
Me: oh don’t bring the chickens up again
Mum: ...
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: where would you even get a parrot?
Mum: I know a woman.
Me: Who?
Mum: just a woman. With parrots.
Me: [sigh] Where is she based
Mum: somewhere
Me: MUM.
Mum: Look, I need a parrot
Me: You don’t NEED a parrot, no one NEEDS a parrot
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mum: You’ll understand with age.
Me: ?????????
Mum: so are you coming?
Me: I... [sigh] you... [sigh]
Mum: is that a yes???
Me: When?
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mum: Now
Me: NOW?
Mum: Now.
Me: ... NOW???
Mum: get in the car.
Me: mum no, please. We can’t do this. Plus I’m busy until 3pm
Mum: 3pm. Be in the car.
Me: Omg dad is allergic to...
Mum: HE’S NOT, HE TELLS LIES
Me: MUM. Why would he lie??
Mum: ...he has an agenda.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: [exasperated] what
Mum: an anti-parrot agenda
Me: please be reasonable, we have a cat
Mum: they will be best friends
Me: mum
Mum: 3pm.
Me: MUM
Mum: Be in the car.
Me: YOU’RE INSA- [she hangs up]
It seems like a simple thing to let your mom get a parrot, but Noor explained that a lot of people live in the house, potentially with allergies, and there's at least one other animal that would enjoy chomping on a parrot head:
I’m going to try and talk her out of this. It’s ludicrous, we have two people in the house who might be allergic AND A CAT.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Will keep this thread updated 🤦🏽♀️
I TRIED TO TALK HER OUT OF IT AND NOW SHE’S SAYING ‘PARROT’ WITH AN ‘S’. She wants more than one???
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: THIS IS RIDICULOUS
Mum: YOU CAN’T JUST GET ONE. It’ll need little friends.
I can’t believe I’m having to bargain with her. Trying to talk her down down from 4 to 1. PREFERABLY NONE.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Before she knew it, Noor was out the door with mom, who seems to have worked asa double agent at some point in her life:
She’s a stone cold liar. No one else in the house knows she’s going on this parrot mission. She just lied to my sister about where we’re going. My sister would actually scream if she knew about my mum’s antics.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Ngl, I’m starting to give in. Sitting here watching my mum lie like pic.twitter.com/qfH5k1XfAQ
We’re on our way to see the parrot lady. My mother looks crazy. She’s driving really fast and giggling to herself pic.twitter.com/Bl2kiDPRbg
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
My sister just called me asking where we are, my mum mouthed “TES-CO, say we’re at TES-CO”. I’m sweating. pic.twitter.com/C5DzxG9SBj
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
The birds were real. Real chickens, and lord help them, real parrots.
WE’RE HERE. BIRD LADY HAS CHICKENS. Mum is getting carried away pic.twitter.com/0axYXw5OFS
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Um. So... We’re on our way home. pic.twitter.com/JZ8fp7JY5H
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
My sister keeps calling. There’s going to be drama when we get home pic.twitter.com/HlKrJGPRHL
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
You don’t understand. We’ve been having this bird argument for a decade now. My mum has been fighting to get birds in the house for YEARS. There’s 11 of us, and half of the fam have always protested. I tried to talk sense to her but she’s gone full rogue.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
WE’RE PULLING UP TO THE HOUSE. pic.twitter.com/s6ne6FKJ48
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Noor's parents were on clear sides, but how would the siblings react?
Sister: What... what have you done
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mum: I’ve done what needed to be done. I need them.
Sister: You didn’t NEED parrots!!
Mum: THEY’RE LOVE BIRDS
Sister: NOOR, why did you let her do this??
Me: pic.twitter.com/Ny1wGw6w0L
Sister: you can’t just bring birds into the house
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: I mean she kind of just did
Sister: pic.twitter.com/TfLp0bOg6O
Me: LOOK, I had to talk her out of chickens. And she wanted four parrots but I bargained it down to two. This could’ve been a lot crazier.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
[enter kids]
Kids: AWWWWWWWW
Mum: just look at them, aren’t they precious?
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Sister: Well yeah they’re adorable but we can’t keep them
Mum: pic.twitter.com/a8OS3YCgWz
All of the kids (& me): pic.twitter.com/nQZKf6n6e8
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Sister: [sigh] okay, well, let’s see what Dad says when he gets home. He’s allergic.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mum: he’s not
Sister: mum.
Mum: he made it up
Sister: mum no.
Mum: As your mother, I am never wrong.
Sister: pic.twitter.com/R4Mt39tWQp
And now we wait for dad. pic.twitter.com/LFuE79W7mc
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
THE RECKONING:
HE’S HOME.
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Dad: pic.twitter.com/6wlZG4ZPXD
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mum: Do you love me?
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Dad: Yes dear, I love you but I don’t think tha-
Mum: I don’t need you to think, I just need to accept the situation.
Dad: pic.twitter.com/URaFRq1Spq
Mum: I NEED them
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Dad: You don’t NEED them
Mum: YOU DONT KNOW ME
Dad: WE’VE BEEN MARRIED FOR 42 YEARS, OF COURSE I KNOW YOU
Mum: THEN YOU KNOW HOW BADLY I NEED THEM
Dad: I HAVE ALLERGIES
Mum: I DON’T SEE YOU SNEEZING
Dad: THAT’S NOT HOW ALLERGIES WORK pic.twitter.com/cWmlsxJc8m
Dad: What if we just kept one?
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: They’re love birds and they mate for life, they’ll very literally die without each other.
Dad [to mum]: that reminds me, I’ve booked us a weekend away for our anniversary this year
The rest of us: awww
Mum: pic.twitter.com/c9HneCvpsn
But he couldn't deflect or withstand the pressure:
Sister: We really need to make a decision guys
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Me: you’re such a mood killer
Sister: You better stfu, you’re just as bad as mum.
[long pause]
Dad: [sigh] what are we naming them?
Mum: pic.twitter.com/SbdLgqAazQ
The rest of us: pic.twitter.com/dsFaOmlcAN
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Dad [to me]: I guess it could be worse. At least she didn’t bring chickens home ha
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
...Little does he know she was asking the bird lady how much each hen costs and if they lay quality eggs pic.twitter.com/WfVhKFjYHP
We haven’t named them yet. Feel free to drop some suggestions! pic.twitter.com/vuK3M6Pxio
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
Mom triumphed, but it's been a big day.
I’m still dizzy from how dramatic this day has been
— Noor (@Himynameisnoor) April 28, 2018
So are we! I just hope the parrots are okay. They've had a really big day, too!
More from Distractify:
26 Dating Red Flags That’ll Make You Cringe
18 Losers to Bring Home If You Want Your Whole Family to Hate You
This Woman Invited Her Ex-Boyfriend to Her Wedding — And He RSVPed With an Amazing Song Request