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This Movie Producer Shared The Worst Pitch He Ever Got—At His Mom's Funeral

This Movie Producer Shared The Worst Pitch He Ever Got—At His Mom's Funeral
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2 weeks ago

Being famous and powerful in film and TV production ain't all it's cracked up to be. You might known Brian Koppelman for his work on Billions, but his family knows him as Brian Who Works In Hollywood. Koppelman probably gets pitched every fifteen minutes when he's at a family reunion, and also when he's at Starbucks, or walking the dog, or basically anywhere a person with a bold idea and no boundaries can approach him. But some of these encounters are much worse than others, as he shared on Twitter recently.

When Koppelman says we're not ready to read this tale, he's not lying. It's a doozy.

It begins just after Koppelan's mother passed away (many years ago). He was already pretty successful. His family lived not far away, so he returned to their home on Long Island to be with his dad and sisters. The rest of their family didn't live far either, so it wasn't long before everyone descended on the house.

Koppelman tried to stick by his dad's side, because even though it's great to have loved ones close in times of grief, it can also be kind of overwhelming. They ended up taking a break together on the porch, sitting quietly and alone. ALONE.

But then Allen entered the scene.

Allen! We all have an Allen in our lives—someone with absolutely no sense or propriety or appropriate behavior. Though this was obviously a terrible, terrible time to talk to Koppelman, Allen was on a mission. He had... a movie idea.

Koppelman mannaged to chase Allen away, but not for long. He would not be deterred.

And Allen was convinced his movie idea was pure gold. It had to be shared, no matter how bad the timing.

Koppelman asked Allen to give him three days as the family sat Shiva, and Allen took it seriously. He waited three days to the second before trying to pitch again.

Allen was so eager, but not so eager that he wasn't looking out for his money. He knew his idea would bring in cash and he wanted protection for his intellectual property.

Here's the humdinger of an idea:

I mean, I would watch that movie. But I think it needs to be fleshed out? And also, I'm betting Tiger Woods is a terrible actor? And also they probably would not agree to it ever?

Koppelman wanted to be clear that Allen is not a terrible person. Just a goofy one.

And he did give Koppelman a great story in the end—he just didn't know it would be about himself.

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