Breakups are usually brutal. They are so powerful that people can't stop writing songs about them, making movies where they are prominently featured, or drastically changing their hair just to avoid the pain of one. Like the song says, "Breakin' up is hard to do."
However for @hoeyhohoho on TikTok, a breakup turned into a celebration when her family erupted into applause after she sent the text that ended it all. Personally, I wouldn't want my family anywhere near me, but to each their own.
Congratulations, you dumped that zero.
"Back on the market!" writes @hoeyhohoho in a caption beneath the TikTok she filmed of her friend hitting send on a lengthy paragraph that contained a big ol' dumperoo. She didn't share anything about her friend's relationship or what facilitated its demise, but I genuinely believe that one or two sentences is usually sufficient.
Based on the level of joy the friend and her family are exhibiting, it stands to reason this person wasn't a very good partner. If that's the case, I'm of the mind you owe them two words, not 200: It's over. Then you immediately smash that block button because the last word should absolutely be yours.
This woman, who for clarity's sake we'll call Taylor, is at dinner with her friend's family. In the background one woman smiles at Taylor with pride and delight. That energy is matched and surpassed by Taylor who leans back in her seat and excitedly beams at the camera. I don't recall ever reveling in a breakup this much, and I once dated a man who urinated into empty water bottles then hid them beneath my bed.
The table begins clapping for Taylor, almost as if she's taking a bow after a final performance. And in a way it was a last performance. It's the last time she'll ever text that person again, hopefully. That's probably why they cheers'd with some wine to mark the occasion.
People in the replies were mostly supportive.
This is definitely the kind of Yass Queen content that social media usually zeroes in on. "She didn't even wait for it to reach him," responded one TikTok user. "She done her part." Another added, "Congratulations!" while someone else called this cute. I'm calling it efficient, if not a bit wordy.
Because comedy is finite, more than one person suggested that this person would either leave her on read or simply reply "OK." As I already stated, the best way to avoid all of that is to immediately block the person. You'll have no idea if they actually respond and are safe in the knowledge that you said your piece.
Is it OK to break up via text?
Several people took issue with the fact that Taylor did the deed via text. Without any information, they decided that was too harsh. If someone was this excited to end a relationship, it was probably bad. Imagine thinking someone owes a possibly toxic ex anything, period. Yikes.
Jonathan Bennett, a certified counselor and relationship expert at Double Trust Dating, told Bustle that "people used to date within their social and community circles so it created an incentive to avoid bad behavior (like breaking up over text)." Since dating has become so virtual, it's more common to breakup over text due to the perceived lack of consequences. This is also why trolls are so commonplace.
While I can only make wildly uninformed guesses about Taylor's head space, Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist, can speak a little bit about the personality of someone who decide to avoid a face-to-face chat. She said the dumper could be lazy or just plain scared, but again I want to point out the exuberance with which Taylor sent that text. She looked justified not scared.
"It may also speak to guilt and shame — and a way to circumvent those uncomfortable feelings by not having to face up to the breakup-ee," explained Dr. Durvasula. Strange that the good doctor didn't at all mention the possibility that the person you're leaving is a "Grade A" jerk. She only listed reasons that paint the sender as bad. I don't care for that.
This article goes on to mention the times it's OK to breakup with someone over text. One is if you feel you're in danger, another is based entirely on the length of time. If you've been dating for a few weeks, is it even a breakup? When appropriate, a breakup text can allow you to really sit and think about what you want to say. it also affords the other person some privacy, so they may grieve the end in their own way.