A couple's vacation in sunny Portugal took a hard left when the girlfriend woke to see her boyfriend playing a video game during the intimate retreat. While crying, she claimed he always spends "every little timeframe" on it instead of doing something with her.
The situation led the boyfriend to Reddit under the username handle by-the-grip-of-Ntropy to ask members of the AITA thread if he was wrong from his perspective.
Throughout the trip, OP spent days sunbathing and enjoyed a beautiful boat trip with his girlfriend but admitted beforehand that his gaming habits were driving a wedge in their relationship.
"I like to game, and I recharge myself while doing so, [but] she doesn't understand it at all," OP stated. "I fully understand that it is not simple to live with somebody who loves to gaze into a display all the time, which is why I heavily restrict it when we spend time together."
The boyfriend goes as far as giving his phone to her while out together to be fully present. Everything was fine until he popped open his notebook while she was showering to do "1-2 quests" in a video game one night. She got very upset.
The following morning, OP woke up around 6 a.m. to make coffee and start a game while his girlfriend slept, sneaking in some "me-time on the computer" to unwind. As mentioned, that backfired on him — his girlfriend was more upset and crying over what he was doing.
OP stated playing video games during their holiday could make him out as a jerk, but he chooses times to enjoy his hobby during moments that wouldn't "matter what I do," referencing when his girlfriend sleeps or is busy.
Thousands of users on the thread came to his defense. One user replied he did "absolutely nothing wrong" and compared his gaming to "watching TV or reading a book." They added, "When she's occupied, you're allowed to do whatever you want."
Another stated, "You both need to have a discussion on expectations," and believed the OP wasn't wrong.
"I game to recharge too," said a Redditor who agrees with OP and acknowledges that gaming during vacation can be unwise. "My partner is understanding, but they'd be much less understanding if I took it to a romantic vacation."
Later in the thread, OP clarified he had a gaming addiction before meeting his girlfriend, alongside several bad habits like "smoking, junk food, clubbing, alcohol." He also mentioned his partner "cries a lot because of me or things I say or do ... I also think that she has a problem with not getting enough intimacy with me."
The entire predicament exposes a deep disconnect between the couple over what they want in the relationship. OP cares about finding time to play a game during downtime, but his partner seems starved for intimacy.
It's unclear what OP did afterward, but this could make or break their relationship if nothing changes.