A woman's post applauding her husband's thoughtful gesture regarding a bunch of dishes he left in the sink is going viral on TikTok.
Susan (@susandoingthings) uploaded a viral clip highlighting how clear communication from her husband turned what could've been a resentful situation into one where she giddily praised how happy she was to be in a relationship with him.
"My husband had people over for like a big game last night and I like look at all these freaking dishes in the sink and then I get this note," she says, panning her camera over to a post-it on the countertop that reads, "I got it!" with an arrow pointing to the mass of dishes in the sink.
"What a good guy!" she says in the clip, before continuing, "See, the thing is just because he left me the note makes me want to like tackle it right. I have morning energy, it's fine, but I just love that he acknowledges that he left a mess in the sink and like, don't worry, he, you know, he'll take responsibility for it, but anyways, we've come so far," she says, smiling into the clip, gushing about the thoughtfulness of her man.
She echoed the glowing sentiment in a caption for her video, which read: "Leaving a simple note instantly made me not care about the dishes in the sink!! I love communication and we have come so far!!"
Commenters who saw the video shared in Susan's enthusiasm, with one person writing: "I love this. Like he was tired and didn’t want to do it but knows you shouldn’t have to. What ace communication and all it took was a post it"
While other people specifically said that it was the fact he decided to communicate with her and letting her know that while he was too tired to do the dishes that he didn't expect to leave them there in the hopes someone else would get them done: "the note changes everything! amazing comunication"
Another replied: "Love the communication!"
"I love this communication. He was too tired to do it after a fun 'party' but knew that if he didn't do it, you would've been annoyed," someone else also wrote.
However, there was one TikToker who thought that this behavior was the "bare minimum" for a partner to do.
And another person joked that they never have to worry about their significant other making a mess in the kitchen and then leave a note promising that they'll clean it up because they don't have a significant other: "the best thing about being single is always waking up to a clean kitchen"
While gestures like the one Susan applauded her husband for carrying out may seem small, they indeed play a very big impact on marriages at large. Family Law Advocate writes that the distribution of household chores/work represent a significant source of marital disputes that ultimately lead to people splitting up.
The piece states: "...household chores are now being cited as one of the more common reasons that couples decide to file for divorce. In one study, for instance, about 25 percent of recently divorced people said that disagreements over housework represented the primary reason for the dissolution of the marriage."
Very Well Mind also wrote another piece titled: "How to Keep Housework From Hurting Your Marriage," and in it, the mounting number of household chores couples often have difficulty delegating between each other evenly comes to a head and is one of the breaking points of many a marriage.
The piece referenced a study that states while heterosexual couples suffer from many arguments that are rooted in gender roles playing a large part in which member of the relationship performs which chores, it went on to say that this struggle also occurs in same sex couples as well.
Basically: if you live with someone, then there are inevitably going to be some people who do more than others, and they're not going to be happy about these inequity in roles.
The term basically boils down to one member of the couple intentionally performing tasks poorly so that the other person will have to bear the burden of consistently performing them.