Life Advice From People Over 40 to Kids in Their 20s Who Only Think They're Adults

Robin Zlotnick - Author
By

May 12 2020, Updated 1:09 p.m. ET

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I don't know about you, but I thought I was a real adult once I was in my 20s. It took me a long time to realize that people in their 20s are still totally kids. As you get older, you learn that you still have so much to learn. 

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One wise person knows this, so they asked Reddit users over 40, people with decades more life experience, to give their best life advice to people in their 20s. Turns out people in their 40s and beyond really do know more than kids in their 20s. Who knew? (They did.)

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JayParty wants young adults to take a step back, look at their life as a whole, and be more than OK if it doesn't follow a linear narrative. "Don't fall for the trap that your life needs to be one long narrative that you should be building. Life is the best when it's a bunch of happy moments that just happen to be connected. Don't try to make your life into a novel. Make it a book of poems."

I like that a lot. Lots of young people are concerned with their trajectory and their "progress." But life isn't a straight vertical line. There are ups and downs and loops and plateaus and it's all OK. 

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In the same vein, purplelicious gives this piece of advice that I want to shout from the rooftops: "It's never too late to start again." Don't make your choices based on the fact that you believe you need to stay on some sort of path. Especially when you're in your 20s! "You have no idea how incredibly young you are and how much time you have to do whatever you want to do," they write.

There's definitely a pressure to "figure it all out" by the time you're out of school. But you're never trapped on one path. You can always make a change, whether it's in your career, your relationships, your living situation, etc. That's so important to realize.

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MayUrBladesNVRdull wants people in their 20s to realize, "It's not a race! Stop comparing yourself to others. Just because they did things sooner than you doesn't mean they're happier or better." Folks, this is a real one. 

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It can be really hard not to look at someone the same age as you and compare their position in life to yours. But it's useless because there are so many factors out of your control that contribute to a person's place in life, and it also doesn't matter! Someone else's path is not your life or your business, and what they're up truly doesn't matter for you!

I like this next piece of advice from DeludedSwoledMan. "Everything you 'get' becomes something you 'have.' Learn how to be happy 'having' things instead of 'getting' them." That's a good one.

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Priorities are different for everyone, and they tend to shift at different points in your life, which is totally great and natural and part of life. But kitskill has some advice on that front for people in their 20s. "Generally I've found people in their 20s prioritize: Job --> Relationship --> Place to live/lifestyle. Really, the people I've found are happiest in their life have done their planning in the opposite direction."

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"Wear sunscreen," writes RufusLoudermilk. "Go to therapy," writes white_collar_devil. "Pay attention to your diet and health," writes Denaris21. This sort of practical advice may seem small and silly, but if you start those healthy habits when you're young, you won't regret it.

EuphoricRealist writes, "I wish I would've spent more of my 20s listening to advice of slightly older people rather than trying to prove that I could figure it out on my own. Imagine how much energy I could've saved." 

I think part of growing up is making mistakes and learning things on your own, but if you acknowledge that you still have stuff to learn and you live with an open heart and mind and listen to those who know better, you will be a better person! And isn't that what life is all about?

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