A few months ago, I went on a first date. It didn't go well. It wasn't really anyone's fault. We just weren't clicking. About an hour into the date I went to the bathroom and spent a normal amount of time in there. By the time I came back to our table she told me that she had already paid for her drinks and she had to go.
I didn't really ask any follow up questions because what good could come from that? Thankfully, the good people of Twitter have just informed me of all the possible reasons she could have given and you know what? I'm glad I didn't ask.
1. Wait, what?
2. Gosh, I love your honesty.
3. You'd understand if you saw her.
4. You don't want that, do you?
5. Must be hard to be Bruce Wayne.
6. He gets so made when I'm late.
7. You'll meet them eventually.
8. Can't that wait?
9. Unless you are into that?
10. We're having a human sacrifice tonight!
11. No, you won't.
12. It's so sticky.
13. As good of reason as any.
14. We've all done it.
15. But you should have seen the other guy.
16. It's important to have priorities.
17. Happens to the best of us.
18. I wouldn't want to be part of any club that would have me as a member.
19. Can't ignore that mystery.
20. She doesn't want to drown when she gets home.
21. Everything is fine. I just don't like you.
22. It's important to stay rested.
23. Time is running out.
24. I have to keep up.
25. Oh, my God! Go!
26. Just boring work stuff.
27. You know the rule.
28. I don't think you understand what's happening here.
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