juryduty

Twitter's 19 Funniest Excuses To Get You Out Of Jury Duty

By

Jan. 18 2019, Updated 8:39 a.m. ET

I served on a jury shortly after graduating college. It was fine, because I didn't have a job at that point and didn't have anything better to do. 

However, if you were to ask me today to serve on a jury I would do whatever I could to get out of it. I have too many other things on my plate to worry about small stuff, like the pursuit of justice. I could simply say that I don't think I can be impartial and that normally gets you off pretty quickly. But that seems boring so I think I'll use one of these more creative responses. 

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1. Does the tapeworm get a say?

2. Do you want to go against the prophesy?

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3. I think we're done here.

4. Everyone loves it when the jury jokes around.

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5. This is how I react to the law.

6. What would you expect me to do?

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7. Hahahahaha!

8. No touching!

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9. Good job!

10. Meow meow meow.

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11. I love pretending.

12. You'll get out of jury duty, but find yourself right back in the courtroom.

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13. What? This is how we used to do it.

14. Go on. Quiz me.

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15. How do you expect me to sit through this?

16. Oh boy.

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17. He only writes in squiggles.

18. Sup?

19. Uh...

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