During JB Smoove's episode of Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, he talked about his peculiar butter pecan ice cream eating habits. Namely, that he eats the ice cream first and then leaves all of the soaked, pecan bits at the bottom of the pint to consume at the end.
After hearing this bit of bizarreness, Seinfeld did what he does best: cuts right to the universal truth of what everyone is really thinking after hearing such a strange manner of eating ice-cream: by simply stating, with conviction that people are weird.
Especially when it comes to our food eating habits. I know people who only eat tuna fish with mustard, their eggs with curry paste, and their cucumbers...with mayonnaise.
If you work in the food service industry, then you're definitely no stranger to the weird food consumption habits of fellow human beings, like this Starbucks barista who posted a photo of a customer's request that was so intricate, it required two stickers to show the entire order.
To give you an idea of just how absurd this drink is, she tweeted a follow-up photo of what it looks like after she just included the requested syrups in the order.
No coffee. No milk, just weird flavor-juices.
People wanted to know if she actually made the drink, and yes, she did follow-through with the stomach churning order. Believe it or not, asking for all the additional fixins' didn't make the drink cost an arm and a leg, either.
Other baristas started sharing their gross drink orders, and they were just as jam-packed of barfiness.
Like this one person who once encountered an individual who drank 17 shots of espresso...from a single cup.
Then there appears to be another who, inexplicably requested 25 pumps of vanilla flavored syrup...blech.
The Barista Confessions began.
there was a girl at my store who would get a venti iced coffee with 7 pumps of vanilla, 7 caramel, 7 toffee nut, 5 classic, and 7 hazelnut with ex heavy cream. like I thought that was bad.— Jacqueline Gonzalez (@captainyackie) March 19, 2018
This one time this girl got a venti dirty chai w/ 15 pumps chai i was shook.— 🥤 (@deemuney15) March 20, 2018
People attempted to understand the logic that these weird-beverage drinking individuals employed when concocting their drinks.
I’m so curious how someone arrives at that number. Did she start with like 10 pumps and keep coming back? Gets to 14, and is like...mm, not *quite* there yet. Does 15 <pleasantly surprised> Mm! Decides to try 16...oh, no. Ack. Definitely 15 pumps.— Sarah F. (@verbalcupcake) March 20, 2018
Some people think that it's not a real order at all, just an application developer trying to put the Starbucks order app through its paces to see if it could handle any order it threw at it, no matter how complicated.
It could maybe be an app developer doing testing? I work on a mobile ordering app and sometimes we have to do crazy shit, lol. Including placing orders across the country.— Chloē Bridges 🐦 (@ChloeGameDev) March 20, 2018
Now that may be the case, but then again, there are people who order some weird stuff. I should know, because every time I go to Blaze pizza I basically put a meat and salad on top of my pie.
So all of these monstrosities can't be chalked up to just testing.
What's also annoying is that these complex orders are ultimately super wasteful.
While a lot of the drinks are jam-packed with sugar, others love the artificial sweeteners. Like this customer who put 15 Splendas in their beverage.
That's right. 15.
In case you were wondering what the original drink looked like that started this whole thread, a fellow barista recreated it just to see what it would look like.
That's a whole lot of 'beetus right there.
As a father of two, I'm constantly worried about "spoiling" my kids. I don't want to discipline my toddler when he draws on the wall or won't listen to his mom, but there are times when I have to stop pretending to be a lion or T-Rex and let him know that his behavior is really crappy.
And although it's easy to develop into a cheap fellow-parent shamer and get up on my high horse and talk about how much better behaved my kid is than theirs (in some instances, it's true) — and that's because some parents just hate being the bad guy. Or even worse, they are helicopter parents.
When your children start running around and destroying another person's house, throwing toys/food all over the place, bullying the other little cuties who are just trying to have fun, and pulling on a two-week-old infant's hair while she's sleeping, then you might want to sit their butts down and get mean. Otherwise, you're raising someone who thinks there are no consequences for garbage behavior.
And as these teachers and child care workers of Reddit revealed in a recent Ask Reddit post, there are tons of kids who turned out just downright awful on account of their parent's poor child-rearing decisions. Whether it's never letting kids do things for themselves or thinking that their children are the bees-knees — no matter what anyone says — these tales of reverse child abuse are just sad.
When I moved across the country a couple of months ago, I was trying to find a short-term place to stay while I looked around for an apartment to make my home. I've gone through my share of shady sublets, and was so worried I wouldn't land a spot that I started looking for one to book months in advance. On my first day of browsing, I came across a gorgeous and affordable one-bedroom in a really convenient location, but was super skeptical of the post because of how traumatized I am from my previous experiences.
I've dealt with creeps who ask for a cash deposit then claim they're in the hospital on the exact same day they're supposed to meet me for the keys. I've had people cancel my reservation once I've already landed in their city... Needless to say, I'm a seasoned subletter. When I found this lovely one-bedroom on Craigslist, I was sure the listing was too good to be true. So I took a proactively defensive stance when I reached out via email. I asked for boring specifications on the apartment and went over payment details with exhaustive thoroughness. I even asked if a friend could stop by to make sure there were no secret squatter tenants, or anything sketchy like that. Then, I got an email back.
TWIST: I recognized the address from the gushing fan mail I had sent it years ago. The apartment belonged to my favorite living writer and here I was, casually emailing with her directly. Flash forward a few months and we're friendly and occasionally email each other or meet for coffee to catch up. And that's how my nightmare sublet search turned into a friendship with one of the best and most famous writers of our time.
I live for real-life plot twists like this. They keep us on our toes while we cruise through this journey of life. Which is why when u/whytho37 asked Reddit to share their most insane plot twists, the results were incredible.
Scroll down for twists so good, you wouldn't believe they actually happened if you saw them in a film.
We’ve all been there. You swipe right on Tinder, decide on a place to meet, and realize about five minutes in that leaving your house in the first place was a huge error. Maybe you feel like you’ve been catfished because they look nothing like their photos (surprise!), or perhaps you quickly realize they weren’t being sarcastic in their profile when they said their favorite band was The Beatles.
Whatever the case may be, there’s no flying spark to indicate this is the person of your dreams. And maybe you’re the mature kind of individual who can finish their drink, bring up the fact that you don’t see a future together, split the bill, and head your own separate ways. Bravo!
But what if you’re not? u/PM_Me_YourTinyBoobs kindly addressed this very question on Reddit when he asked what a person could say to instantly derail a date. The answers ranged from painfully incestuous to downright hilarious.
Next time you just need to shut it down really quickly and abruptly, these are some perfect lines you can use.