Kids always have these weird quirks, and when I mean weird, I mean, really weird. So weird that you have no idea where they picked up the quirk.
When I was three or four, I have distinct memories of sneaking into the bathroom to eat toothpaste when no one was looking. I don't know why I liked the taste of Aquafresh so much, but I just did.
When my son sits down, he does so in reverse-"Indian Style," with his knees flaring out to the side. I don't know how he gets his legs to do that, but just seeing it freaks me out.
Eating things that shouldn't be eaten and sitting in a way that makes adults grimace, however, are pretty "normal" childhood behaviors compared to some of these stories that people are sharing on Twitter.
The thread was kicked off by @prinxeMu who recalled the time they showed just how far they were willing to go to not listen to their mom.
What's the most On Brand™️ story you have from your early childhood.— mu✨ (@prinxeMu) July 8, 2018
Mine is when my mom told me not to touch the electric stove when it was red, because that meant it was hot, so I made direct eye contact with her and slapped my hand down on the stove top.
The moral of the story? @prinxeMu doesn't like being told what to do, even if it means destroying their hand in the process.
People started sharing their own tales of childhood insanity that revealed a lot about their character.
Whether it was a dangerous love for enthusiasm and sweets that lead to smashed teeth.
When I was a toddler my grandma offered me sweets and me, being the overtly excitable mess that I was, ran full tilt towards her.— Sarah LP (@sashajewel472) July 9, 2018
I smashed my teeth on our coffee table. Then had shards for teeth my entire childhood and grew up not being able to talk properly. Grew new ones tho
Or hating sock-creases.
Ha as a toddler I used to be inconsolable with fury that my socks could never be rid of the creases around the ankle. To this day, I tense with resentment when someone suggests I work on my acceptance issues.— Hecate Termagant (@pinkindustry) July 9, 2018
Some children displayed stalwart problem-solving abilities from a young age.
When I was a baby, before I learned to walk, we had this coffee table that always seemed to be in the way of where I was trying to crawl to, so I would just bump my head up against it and push as hard as I could trying to move it out of my way.— Peter Hoff (@HoffPeterA) July 9, 2018
While others were a bit more...unique.
I think mine is when I started buttering the living room couch. Like not by smearing it, I kept taking tiny fingerfulls and carefully dabbing it on the back of the couch. Tiny little finger-dabs of butter covering the whole back of the couch, greasy cheerful baby luc— FriendlyTroll (@DeFriendlyTroll) July 8, 2018
Like being a serial couch-butterer.
And the thing is I KEPT doing it, like every time someones back was turned. They tried keeping it on top of the fridge, but I *still* grabbed it, which scared them bad enough they just kept it on the counter again.— FriendlyTroll (@DeFriendlyTroll) July 8, 2018
they literally could not keep me from doing this wierd thing.
Some kids had an obsession with changing outfits multiple times a day.
either the one thanksgiving where I spent the entire time under the table eating pretzels or the fact that any time i got a speck of anything on my clothes I demanded to change outfits to the point where it was suspected I just like changing outfits— annie! (@dancynrew) July 8, 2018
I too was a frequent outfit changer (I still am, tbh). My dad would get so annoyed that he made the laundry my chore as soon as I was capable of folding clothes appropriately.— Jenn Mari (@JennBunny28) July 9, 2018
A behavior that followed them all the way into adulthood.
As an adult, the first thing I do is change out of my work clothes when I get home. Usually into yoga pants/t shirt. Then if we decide to go out to dinner, I pop on a pair of jeans and (usually) a different shirt. Then when I get home I put on pjs. 🤷🏼♀️— Jenn Mari (@JennBunny28) July 9, 2018
It's when this happens that my mom or dad would say, "See? What did I say? You see what happens?!"
I was told to never pull a plug out of the wall while a lamp was on. I did it anyway b/c I liked the color of the arcing. Until I electrocuted myself and fainted for about 3 seconds.— meredith (@mnmqueen17) July 8, 2018
There was this very precocious 4-year-old.
When I was four years old I learned how to use lottery ticket dispensers from observation; one day while my grandma was paying for groceries, I bought one, since I had a dollar and didn't know they were illegal. She and the cashier panicked when I proudly showed it off to them.— Michel @ Art Fight 🌱 (@menenthas) July 8, 2018
A precociousness that sometimes leads to nightmares.
I won a free book when I was in 1st grade, but chose a 3rd grade book of spooky stories— Gulch (@woven_gulch) July 8, 2018
The first story was about a girl who wore a ribbon around her neck every day, untied it as she was dying, and her head fell off
It scared me so bad that I made my dad return it to the store
Yeah maybe a 1st grader shouldn't be reading this.
A fun day at the pool goes sour.
I decided that without ever having taken a single gymnastics class I could, at age 4, do a back handspring off a diving board into a pool. I cut my chin / throat open on some metal railing nearby and ended up with stitches and a scar.— ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ, ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴇxᴘʟᴀɪɴ (@Stringerplz) July 8, 2018
But not sour enough to stop swimming.
I didn't want to stop swimming even when I realized what had happened, so I held my hand over the wound. My mom saw my bloodied fingers under my chin and briefly was terrified that I had cut my tongue loose— ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ, ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴇxᴘʟᴀɪɴ (@Stringerplz) July 8, 2018
Some were much less dramatic though.
Before school started, when all the kids were playing on the blacktop, I used to sit on my backpack and read. This concerned some of the other moms so much that they told my mom and we had a talk about "antisocial behavior"— Lauren Reeves (@LaurenReevsie) July 8, 2018
Then there was this adorable story about religious guilt.
at age ~7 i was at zellers with my mom and picked up a little cheap bath toy thing and a little piece glued on fell off - I put it down without telling anyone and proceeded to feel real intense guilt and shame about it for the next 20 years— 🌸🍂 Dαrcy Dee🍂🌸 (@neptuneboneface) July 8, 2018
Everyone always loves a good bully revenge story.
I've told this story before but. A boy who'd bullied me said he would tie my shoes for me (I couldn't) and I let him. He tied them in knots so I punched him in the face.— Going to Hell with L (@ldottxt) July 8, 2018
Equally impressive is that they were able to throw a decent punch with their shoelaces tied.
If you were like pretty much everyone in the world, you were probably let down by the fact that Croatia didn't have their storybook ending in taking home first place in the 2018 World Cup. Sure, France had an amazing team and all that, and the contest's youngest MVP player, Mbappé, even donated all of his winnings from the tournament to charity—so I guess it's hard to be too upset with the competition's end result.
And even though everyone played their hearts out (except Egypt, I mean, they went again Saudi Arabia and the results were just embarrassing), there was a clear winner this World Cup and it actually wasn't even any of the teams. S
ure there's a first, second, and third place result, but all of those accomplishments pale in comparison to the wonderful memes that sprung up as a result of this glorious tournament.
More than a few were thanks to Brazil's Neymar.
I grew up in a marginally superstitious family who brought some beliefs and hocus-pocus superstitions from the old country. I couldn't make too much noise late at night for fear of attracting a "jinn." I couldn't point at cemeteries or stare into a mirror for too long or my face would become deformed, and heaven help me if I was ever mean to or disobeyed my parents or grandparents, because then I'd be looking at a cursed life that would ruin me until the day that I died.
But the idea of "back luck" or stepping on cracks, walking under ladders, or stealing a black cat's macchiato isn't something that my family really bought into. Sure, we believed in supernatural stuff and the idea that karma gets back around to mess with you or your kids, but "bad luck"?
No honey, it isn't luck that's ruining your life, it's an unseen species of metaphysical monsters that exist in a different plane we know little about—but they are mentioned in the Quran, so be careful!
There are phenomena so unfortunate that simply looking at images of them will cause the same bad luck to befall you. So on this Friday the 13th, gaze upon these pictures with extreme caution.