Woman Forces Husband to Stay up With Newborn So He Can Experience Sleep Deprivation First Hand

Was this a new mother wrong for inviting her family over to show her husband how inconsiderate he was being of her sleep deprivation?

Mustafa Gatollari - Author
By

Feb. 19 2024, Published 8:30 a.m. ET

AITA: Woman Forces Husband to Stay Up and Care for Baby
Source: Reddit | @Adorable_Banana

A new mom who tried giving her husband a taste of his own medicine wants to know if she was in the wrong for intentionally inviting her family over, forcing him to entertain guests after spending all night tending to their baby.

Redditor @Adorable_Banana posted to the site's r/AITAH sub where she relayed how fed up she's been in recent years with the behavior displayed by her husband after they welcomed a new baby into the world.

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OP writes that ever since she and her partner had their child around 4 months ago, she's only been getting around 3-4 hours of sleep every single night, aka the plight of the new parent, and that's if she's "lucky."

Unfortunately, she says, her husband didn't appreciate or consider that she was constantly tired.

A fact that manifested itself in that he would plan days chock full of events even though she was overtired. This included inviting his family over even though she was "exhausted" and didn't want "to entertain."

Even though she expressed to him several times that this kind of planning, or lack thereof, makes her upset, he never seemed to get the hint.

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AITA: Woman Forces Husband to Stay Up and Care for Baby
Source: Reddit | @Adorable_Banana

Cut to one particularly brutally sleepless night: the baby wouldn't go to sleep until 4 am. OP passed out, only to hear the doorbell sounding off at 8 am: it was her husband's mother and niece and they stayed in the house until sometime after 3 pm.

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OP said that she was angry and exhausted and it was after this incident that she decided to devise a little ploy that would force her husband to see how it feels when he pulls those shenanigans on her.

"Last night I decided I was going to show him how it feels vs tell him to see if he got the hint. I did not tell him my plans. I kept him awake all night with the baby. All night. I intentionally kept passing her off to him every single time she got "busy" (she loves moving around). She fell asleep around 3 am. I invited my mother and siblings over," she wrote.

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AITA: Woman Forces Husband to Stay Up and Care for Baby
Source: Reddit | @Adorable_Banana

The Adorable Banana continued: "They arrive at 10 am. They did not leave until 10 pm (so 2.5 hrs ago). My husband was drained, all day. Completely exhausted, irritated, etc. Kept asking me when my family was leaving so he could relax/sleep. I didn't make them leave however because he never makes his family leave."

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Once her family did eventually peace out of the house, her husband was furious. He told her he was "literally exhausted" from having to take care of the baby all night, and once OP dropped the bomb on him that she did it all on purpose, he was absolutely livid.

It was at this moment that OP decided to reveal to her significant other that she indeed planned the whole thing and that she wanted him to know what it felt like for her to have to stay up all night and care for their children.

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reddit mom husband tasteo of own medicine
Source: Reddit | @Adorable_Banana

Apparently, that didn't sit too well with him and she wanted to know if she was in the wrong for devising this plot in the first place: "Now he's pissed because I devised this plan against him and he feels played. Says that I could have done anything else and that this was ignorant and petty because he's 'had a migraine all day' and "needed to fucking sleep but was expected to entertain" and "my family isn't as f------ loud as yours is"

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She did provide some further context into the situation, however, explaining that her mother-in-law actually doesn't really help all that much whenever she comes over and that she provides a lot of suggestions on best childcare practices that ultimately aren't really all that helpful: "to clear up confusion, MIL does not come over to see the baby or to help me in any way."

The Redditor also clarified that her MIL isn't overly affectionate when it comes to child-rearing either: "She has held the baby maybe 4 times (one of your "you're gonna spoil her if you hold her too much. Stick her in her crib and let her cry it out" types of person). She walks through the door and starts immediately following my husband around and telling him how great he's doing."

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reddit mom husband tasteo of own medicine
Source: Reddit | @Adorable_Banana

Redditors who responded to her story sided with OP, stating that it wasn't very cool of her significant other to invite his mother over so early in the day: "Anyone who invites guests over at 8:00 in the morning is a top-grade asshole. Who does that?" one person wrote.

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Someone else inquired as to what the visitation situation looked like whenever OP's mother-in-law visited their house: "I'm wondering who is expected to host? Is OP cooking lunch or dinner for them? Making coffees and teas? Are they helping when they come over or just sitting on their asses expecting to be served?"

To which the Redditor responded with the following: "My MIL expects me to do everything and doesn't help with the baby at all. She follows my husband around like a stray dog, telling him how great he's doing. She's held the baby maybe 4 times."

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