'Talladega Nights'
Source: Columbia Pictures

Celebrate the 15th Anniversary of 'Talladega Nights' With Ricky Bobby's 7 Most Quotable Lines

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Aug. 4 2021, Published 1:23 p.m. ET

On your marks, get set... Shake and bake!

In 2006, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby raced onto the comedy scene with its laugh-out-loud antics and Will Ferrell's hysterical one-liners.

The film follows Ricky Bobby (Will Ferrell) as NASCAR's No. 1 racecar driver who has tons of adoring fans, a blond trophy wife, and a lot of money.

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But this egotistical driver gets a bit of a wake-up call when he loses to French Formula One champion Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen). No longer at the top of his game, Ricky Bobby is kicked to the curb by his wife and best friend, and with the help of his father, must pull himself out of his despair to get back on top.

Talladega Nights is filled with such memorable comedic quotes that in honor of the film's 15th anniversary, we've rounded up our favorites.

'Talladega Nights'
Source: Columbia Pictures
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7 Best Quotes from 'Talladega Nights' in honor of the film's 15th anniversary.

1. "Here's the deal, I'm the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence."

Let's face it, Ricky Bobby is not a humble man. The No. 1 NASCAR driver is overly arrogant and constantly reminding people of just how great he is. Well, until he crashes his car and thinks that he's on fire. Gosh darn it, Ricky Bobby.

2. "Well let me just quote the late, great Colonel Sanders, who said: 'I'm too drunk to taste this chicken.'"

In case you didn't know, Colonel Sanders was an American businessman, best known as the founder of the fast-food chain restaurant KFC. However, we're pretty sure the Colonel never uttered this classic line, though we really wish he had.

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'Talladega Nights'
Source: Columbia Pictures

3. "Help me, Jesus! Help me Jewish God! Help me Allah! AAAAAHHH! Help me, Tom Cruise! Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me!"

When Ricky Bobby crashes his racecar during a competition, he bolts and starts running around thinking he's on fire, despite his pit crew repeatedly telling him he's fine. In typical Hollywood fashion, it seems the writers couldn't help but poke fun at Tom Cruise.

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4. “If you ain’t first, you’re last.”

Ricky Bobby's go-to catchphrase. And, he's not wrong ....

Don't forget, that phrase is trademarked and should only be used by Ricky Bobby Inc.

'Talladega Nights'
Source: Columbia Pictures
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5. “Dear Lord Baby Jesus, or as our brothers to the south call you, Jesús, we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Domino’s, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family, my two beautiful, beautiful, handsome, striking sons, Walker and Texas Ranger, or T.R. as we call him, and of course, my red-hot smoking wife, Carly, who is a stone-cold fox.”

Ricky Bobby is a very religious man who prays before his meals. While having dinner with his family and friend Cal, Ricky says grace before they consume their delicious meal of fast-food favorites.

6. “Are we about to get it on? Because I’m as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.”

Ricky's new love interest Susan (Amy Adams) gives him a passionate pep talk about winning, which really revs his engine.

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'Talladega Nights'
Source: Columbia Pictures

7. “This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons."

Ricky Bobby is so obsessed with being the best and obtaining fame and sponsorships that he is even willing to sacrifice his safety to get another brand name – Fig Newton – across the windshield of his car.

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