Father Refuses to Pay for a Tribute to His Daughter’s Stepfather at Her Wedding — Here’s Why

Haylee Thorson - Author

Jul. 5 2023, Published 2:56 p.m. ET

A bride walking down aisle with father, wedding guests watching stock photo with Reddit screenshot on top
Source: Getty Images/Reddit

Here comes the bride! Or, should we say, the bride’s stepfather? In the AITA Reddit thread, u/Numerous_Way9705 explained a tricky situation he encountered during his daughter’s wedding planning.

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After his daughter’s stepfather treated him terribly for years, the Redditor couldn’t believe it when she asked him to help pay for and plan a tribute to her stepfather at the wedding. So, what went down exactly? Here’s what you need to know.

The father of bride giving a toast at a wedding reception
Source: Getty Images
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A dad refused to honor his daughter’s stepdad at her wedding.

The Redditor began by providing context about the situation, stating that he has two children — a daughter named Emily and a son named Hayes.

He prefaced that his wife left him shortly after their second child was born for her high school sweetheart Sam and that they married several months later. The kicker? The Redditor and Sam couldn’t stand one another.

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According to the Redditor, Sam and his daughter, Emily, became incredibly close during her upbringing, and Sam would constantly belittle his parenting skills.

However, Sam seemingly wanted nothing to do with Emily’s younger brother, Hayes, which the Redditor speculated was because his son was gay and Emily was straight.

But that didn’t stop Sam and Emily from forming a close-knit bond that followed into Emily's adulthood.

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A bride and her father on her wedding day
Source: Getty Images

“He told me one day he would be walking her down the aisle,” the creator recalled. “And maybe she'd even want him to do it alone and would not want me anywhere near them for that.”

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Fast forward several years and the Redditor’s daughter Emily is finally getting married. However, the situation was unlike anything the father could have possibly anticipated.

He explained that Sam had been diagnosed with a motor neuron disease and was wheelchair-bound. The Redditor also mentioned that Sam's speech abilities had significantly diminished, and his mobility was compromised.

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Because of this, Emily asked her father if he would help her plan and finance a tribute to Sam at her wedding. The father's answer? “I told her I could not.”

The daughter’s fiancé chastised her dad for not honoring her stepdad.

Comments from the AITA Reddit post about a dad refusing to honor his daughter's stepfather at her wedding
Source: Reddit

Naturally, the Redditor offered his daughter an explanation about why he wouldn’t help her pay for a special tribute to Sam at her wedding.

“I told her Sam and I did not have a positive relationship, and there is no way I would ever spend my money or time doing something nice for the man,” the creator explained.

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“I told her he had treated me poorly over the years, and I accepted she loved him," he continued. "But he was not worthy of my money or that effort in my eyes."

Although Emily was upset with her father’s decision, she still accepted it. However, her fiancé wouldn’t take his future father-in-law’s “no” for an answer.

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The Redditor revealed that his daughter’s fiancé called him and said he was breaking his daughter’s heart by refusing to honor her stepdad at their wedding.

However, that wasn’t the worst comment.

According to the creator, his future son-in-law also said, “It's clear I am enjoying watching Sam suffer as he is and that's proven by my actions and I'm not being a good dad to Emily.”

So, was he the a------ for refusing to pay for and plan a tribute to his daughter’s stepfather at her wedding?

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