Navigating the cesspool that is online dating can be a nerve-wracking experience that leaves everyone even more distrustful than they were before of pursuing a romantic relationship with another human being. No wonder more folks are opting to have sex with their smartphone cameras than actual people these days.
It can become especially tiresome and hopeless after you've been going on date after date until you finally find someone that piques your interest and makes your heart race a little bit every time you're around them.
Then, they go and gum up the works by doing something you consider a huge relationship no-no, like being really into Ed Sheeran or refusing to hit the dance floor at weddings.
If only there was a way to ensure that the person you're interested in doesn't waste your time by hitting you with a significant other-bombshell down the road.
Sure, nothing like that would matter if you actually loved the person and weren't just looking for a great settlement, but it's 2021 and real love is dead, so stuff like this is understandably very important to people.
This is why Annie Wright is ahead of the game.
Maybe she drew inspiration from Larry David's Sexual-Relationship NDA, or perhaps she was simply trying to be funny, but Annie thought it'd be a great idea to send a guy she matched with, Michael Head, a subsequently started dating on Tinder for two weeks a relationship contract. A seventeen page one.
Seriously, you can check out her entire video presentation on TikTok where yes, she's wearing business casual attire. In the clip, Annie hits at the reasoning for her "draft" of the contract.
"I made the idea as a joke, then he said, 'No, seriously. We can do that and talk about it.' So the grand contract was drafted and in it, there were four main clauses, with their own sub-clauses and addendums that guided the spirit of the agreement: awareness of a partner's needs, aligning intentions in a clear manner, communication, and honesty.
Like most business contracts, there's probably a lot of redundancy.
Annie told the New York Post that she met Michael after exiting a reportedly "toxic relationship" which may have been the impetus for her to think about future partnerships more closely. She said she was "determined" to ensure that her go with Michael would "work out."
"At the time, I had braces in college, and I was very embarrassed. It was also pandemic time. But I got to the point where I was like ‘screw it — I’m going on dates with guys and don’t care anymore.’ I matched with almost anybody on Tinder and would tell my matches, ‘I’m going on a walk with my dog at 2 p.m. today — are you free?’ It was a fluke that I met him. I was going on three Tinder dates a week to go out there and meet people."
Annie says it didn't take long for her and Michael to hit it off. The two were instantly gaga for one another, with Michael telling Annie that he wanted the two of them to be girlfriend and boyfriend right away.
They then drafted the agreement which lays a few ground rules for their relationship. For her asks, Annie requests that under no circumstances will Michael give her the "silent treatment." He's also not allowed to "isolate her from her loved ones" and that hes expected to foot the bill for date nights.
She also asked him to "work out at least five times a week" and she would love a "romantic gesture once every two weeks."
If this all sounds stiff and a little bit like and a demonstration of commerce at work, Annie and Michael would agree with you.
She said, "We treat our relationship almost like a business interaction. We deal with conflict like partners in business would. We sit down and treat it more like we’re partners in life, and love is an added bonus," in an interview with The Sun.
Annie said that Michael might add clauses of his own, like asking her to remember to take off her shoes when she enters their apartment, something that she always forgets to do.
The college stuent went on to call the idea to create relationship contracts a "game changer" and that more people should adopt this idea: "I'd recommend all couples have one. It's the best thing ever."
She continued by stating that just "falling" into relationships is a surefire way of setting yourself up for heartbreak: "People just fall into relationships. This makes me know what I’m signing up for. I live in constant fear of waking up two years into a relationship and realizing my partner doesn’t have the same life plan as me."
"You’ve put one or two years into a relationship, but you don’t agree on the core things. If you don’t have that core connection, you’re wasting time and prolonging heartbreak. At this point, we update it every six months or so. We’ll visit it," she added.