It's not every day that you get to say you've encountered real genius. Staggering intellect. Impressive innovation. But luckily for you, today is one of those days. Because a god among men decided to share with the world the foolproof way he once got out of work by photoshopping a flat tire onto a picture of his car.
I know what you're thinking. "Man, I really need to learn Photoshop." I know. Me too. If you can learn Photoshop, it seems, you can shrug and apologize your way out of any situation. And that's exactly what Twitter user @PapaBoardslide did one day when he just sort of didn't feel like going to work.
This is one of those ideas that needs to end up in the history books, alongside sliced bread, the light bulb, and the wheel. The photoshopped work excuse. @PapaBoardslide should be extremely proud of himself. He has changed the game. Now let's take a closer look at these photos.
This is the "before." Honestly, his real tire looks a little flat to begin with. But it does look like it's still drivable, so he probably couldn't have gotten away with using the photo as is. That was just fine for @Papaboardslide because he's got the Photoshop skills to create the narrative he wants, to bend the story of the day to his will.
Look at this! It's flawless. Sure, the hubcap is different, but chances are his employer doesn't study the hubcaps of all their employees on their first day. They'll never know. Maybe if you have a super keen eye, you could tell it was fake from the shadows or the angel of the car or something, but for a photo that's getting frantically texted to a boss who will look at it for a split second, this is a pretty perfect Photoshop job.
Obviously, @Papaboardslide's tweet went completely viral because of the ingenuity, commitment, and Photoshop prowess he displayed. People all over the internet were extremely impressed with his work, as they should have been.
And yes, the tire iron! Let's talk about the tire iron. I feel like it lends an extra layer to the flat tire excuse. Not every flat tire is an excuse to miss work entirely. If you call AAA or get the car to the nearest garage, it could only take a couple hours, and his boss could have insisted he come in late.
But the tire iron implies that @Papaboarslide is taking matters into his own hands. Between taking the flat tire off, putting a spare on, and getting the tire replaced... Well, that seems like it's going to take a whole day to me! The tire iron was a nice touch.
But there was one potential flaw in the plan...
@KingBlobb had the same thought we all did, I'm sure. I'm really glad @Papaboarslide decided to share his incredible idea for getting out of work with us, but what if his workplace sees his tweet? They might be even more likely to now that it has gone super viral. Did @Papaboardslide just royally screw himself over?
Of course he didn't! He's proven already that he's too smart to do something that dumb. These were screenshots and a story he's been holding onto for two years, waiting for the perfect moment to unleash them on the world. When he did, he finally got the recognition he has so richly deserved all this time. So thank you for your service, @Papaboardslide. I now have some Photoshop to go learn.