If you've ever ventured into the world of reading fan fiction online, then you have my condolences.
The stories might feature all of your favorite characters and some pretty descriptive writing, but the content usually takes a wild turn. And by wild, I mean downright pornographic.
Usually it's pretty easy to distinguish between fan fiction and the real stuff, but if you're trying to find a copy of a book online, you could easily end up clicking on the wrong thing in your desperate search for material. Which is probably what happened to this Twitter user's friend.
It all started with Shelley Zhang receiving a text from her friend asking if Dudley dies in Order of the Phoenix, which sounded a bit off to them.
Things really got off the rails when Zhang's friend mentioned that the, "Wizarding Age of Consent is 15," and that Draco and Ginny fake a rape scene, something that one of the stories entirely revolves around, apparently.
Shelley's post blew-up, which pretty much forced her to post more screenshots of her and her friend's conversation about the unbelievable fan fiction's plot.
Ok, instead of working, now I have to post more screenshots from our conversation.— Shelley Zhang (@shelzhang) July 11, 2017
It just keeps getting better.
Especially when the necrophilia drops.
Then Shelley started posting excerpts of the fan fiction, in utter disbelief that they once thought it was the real thing.
Which meant that no, there were no birth control spells or sex-education classes at Hogwarts.
And no, Harry doesn't get muscles from running.
Some parts weren't all sex-related, though.
Shelley just couldn't believe he got so far in to realize the plot was too strange for actual publication.
I can't believe that it took Dudley killing himself for him to be like, wait, something seems off. And not like, the threats of necrophilia.— Shelley Zhang (@shelzhang) July 10, 2017
Even if some of the scenes were absolutely incredible.
It turned out to be a tough pill for her friend to swallow.
As upset as he was, there were tons of people on Twitter who were just cracking up at his mistake.
Can we PLEASE have a book club for this fanfic & can your friend be our Oprah— Mara (@mara__iara) July 11, 2017
I don't know what's worse, that they legitimately thought this was real or that they kept reading it probably meaning they were enjoying it.— DollarBillMontgomery (@HBJohnXuandou) July 11, 2017
Honestly "Yes in hindsight it's so clear" is my new quote of the year. Your friend is king/queen of accidental reading of fanfics.— Swagtrillion (@i_amswag_) July 11, 2017
Some even thought there was something admirable about his dedication to reading the very strange series.
When I think of vending machines I think of frustration. Of late hours at some government building waiting to get some bureaucratic nonsense taken care of. Or stressful times at a hospital. Unhealthy snacks and feeling gross immediately after I cave into my desire for junk food.
But it doesn't have to be that way. There are plenty of awesome vending machines out there that go above and beyond the stale chips and crusty, white-dust-coated candy bar stereotype.
These are the vending machines of the future, and the future's looking pretty darn good.
Dads. They’re notorious for their senses of humor—whether cheesy or savage, witty or groan-worthy, they never miss an opportunity to try and make us laugh. In fact, dads are such natural comedians they often crack us up without even meaning to. It should come as no surprise then, that when dads learn to text, hilarity ensues.
Here are 21 dads who prove that, in their hands, smartphones are truly a blessing: