If you've ever tried to connect to the Internet in a highly populated area, you know just how creative people can get with their WiFi connections and mobile hotspot names.
From puns to jokes, to trying to force you to say ridiculous things out loud, people love to show off their humor when they name their networks. If you want to see this phenomenon at its peak, we invite you to try and log on to the internet at any college dorm or university library. Everyone is eager to boast their newfound knowledge with obscure arthouse and film noir jokes.
Here are a collection of people's best attempts at making WiFi hilarious.
These names are fresh.
When James here moved into his new apartment he started making trouble in the neighborhood — by naming his wifi network something other than a line from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air theme song.
I have so many questions about how this started. Was there a coordinated plan by the first floor residents, or did Apartment 1A just start the ball rolling and the rest of the people on his floor hopped on the train to see it through?
Aww. Very punny, but also kind of sweet. Then again, this is typically a phrase uttered when someone is facing certain death, so maybe someone ought to check in on this person and make sure they're OK?
Anyone who's ever worked in a coffeeshop knows the frustration of customers who seem to think the free public wifi is an invitation to park themselves at a table, pour some (free) water, and act like it's their personal office for several hours. Not only does this frustrating entitlement mean paying customers struggle to find a table, but the shop loses out on revenue. Clearly, this Irish cafe had it with the freeloaders and christened their wifi network with a name that would drive the message home.
The reality of apartment living is that you can pretty much hear everything your neighbors are doing, even those private moments together. Here we have a dweller who decided to inform his fellow residents he can hear them having sex. In a bold power move, another person in the building pointed out why the owner of "We Can Year You Having Sex!" might have such a problem with that.
Now this looks like a fun neighborhood for nerds who love tech puns. There's another "Tell My Wi-Fi Love Her," but personally my favorites are probably Silence of the LANs and Titanic Syncing.
CeX is a pawn store in the United Kingdom, apparently.
Much as is the case with sex, an unsecured network can leave you vulnerable to viruses, so you should probably make sure you have protection — you know, like a VPN.
Just make a noise complaint.
In another passive aggressive network christening, one neighbor tells another resident their taste in music sucks. But I have to side with the network owner who called out that person for using "you're" instead of "your," which is way more offensive than even the most cacophonous death metal or glitch EDM.
You should see someone about that.
The highlighted network above belongs to a urologist's office. I guess if you're going into a line of work where you're basically looking at penises all day, you've gotta maintain a healthy sense of humor.
This seems like a serious neighborhood incident.
From the looks of these network names, it seems a heist involving some fenced flamingos took place, followed by said flamingo burglar trying to turn a profit on the stolen birds. And clearly someone else close by isn't a fan. Do we need to notify the authorities?
One for the Bill Nye fans.
While not quite as impressive as the Fresh Prince theme song train above, you gotta appreciate how all these neighboring networks paid homage to the theme song from everyone's favorite educational after-school program.
You need a high IQ to understand this one.
The story I like to tell myself here is that one Rick and Morty fan named their network, then the second moved in and delightedly named theirs and hoping it would lead to the start of an incredible friendship. And then they traveled through dimensions together looking for Mulan Szechuan sauce.
The redditor who shared this one admits they were being passive aggressive when they named their wifi network in honor of the owner of an improperly parked Mercedes. Well, in keeping with the stereotype about Mercedes drivers, ostensibly the owner came back with a regularly-aggressive response: say it to my face!
WHY NOT ZOIDBERG?
If you love old memes and the Matt Groening cartoon Futurama, this one's for you.
Beats having to pay $19.99 for an hour...
This one is kind of sweet. Seems like someone is being neighborly and decided if you're within earshot, you can share their wifi. I might try this with a slight modification and rename mine "bring me an eggroll for password."
Someone warn the owner of "Abraham Linksys" above, because there's a network on the loose with its heart set on assassination.
Slow pageloads make me lose my mind
Hey, remember LMFAO? Well, anyway, I'm sorry, but you now will have "Party Rock Anthem" stuck in your head the rest of the day.
Does anyone object?
While not quite as clever as "Tell my wifi love her," this one's pretty cute.
Sounds like it was a fun flight.
The redditor who shared this wifi network name was on an airplane searching for a hotspot when they came across this person. On the one hand, it's pretty cool they were able to create a hotspot at 30,00- feet. On the other hand, the least they could do is leave it open for others to use if they're up there cropdusting their fellow passengers.
Cache Rules Everything Around Me
This wi-fi ain't nothin' to F with, apparently. And if you want to beef, then bring the ruckus.
WHO DID THIS?!
The above network was found while the redditor who shared it was visiting a nursing home. Guess everything we heard about retirement communities is true, and this particular facility has one real Lothario on their hands.
Who do we believe?
You have to admire the honesty of the network owner on the bottom here. Either way, if I lived in this building I'd be a bit concerned about the potential for noxious fumes coming from both these apartments.
For you, no way.
Give it to me baby — the password, that is. And now that song has replaced the LMFAO song in my head. I'm not sure which is worse.
One network to rule them all.
This is a secured network, so I'm afraid NONE SHALL PASS.
It's pretty reasonable to assume the owners of this network are uploading some seriously NSFW content.
Don't we all?
Unfortunately, this pun is forever tainted for us thanks to Robert Kelly's alleged offenses.
Their poor minds.
This network is located near an all-girls Catholic school. Either the administration has a very inappropriate sense of humor or someone who lives close by may or may not have a court mandate to stay at least 500 feet away from said school at all times.
I'm guessing the residents surrounding a Porsche dealership banded together to troll its patrons with their network names.
We've got a real game of thrones going here. Of course, these networks were clearly named a while ago, since House Baratheon doesn't even exist. Also, not to nitpick, but Snow is a bastard name — they don't get noble houses unless they get in really good with one of the great houses.
I love a place of worship with a sense of humor.