Boss Wouldn't Accept Employee's Resignation So She Quit on the Spot and Started Their New Job the Next Day
When you get a new job, it's common courtesy to give your current company two weeks notice. In theory, it's a polite thing to do to allow them to look for a replacement before you leave. In practice, it's a bit more complicated than that.
Sometimes, bosses are not happy that you chose to leave and make the last two weeks of your employment living hell. And some, apparently, simply choose not to accept your resignation at all. That's what happened to the OP of this new "Am I the A-hole?" post.
OP writes that her old boss was "a real turd." To explain a little more eloquently, she writes, "He labored under the delusion that he was an excellent boss and couldn't put together that his behavior and the crappy pay was why he had such a hard time keeping employees."
Some examples of his bad behavior: he thought it was OK to call female employees "hun, sweetie, and sugar." What century is this? Ew, gross. Additionally, he was condescending and often passed over women to give less qualified men promotions.
OP stayed until she could find another job, and once she had an offer, she put in her two weeks' notice. You know how her boss responded? He said, "Oh sweetie, you know you can't leave." What does that even mean?! Ugh.
She said she absolutely was leaving; she'd found another job. But the boss simply refused to accept her resignation. "I'm not accepting this, sugar," he said. "Guess you're here to stay." OP got so mad (understandably so!) that she decided to prove to him just how much she was leaving this job.
She said, "Well, screw this then, I quit. Effective immediately." And then, while sitting right in front of him, she called her new job, explained what happened, and agreed to start the next day. Her gross boss just sat there "slack jawed" while she packed her stuff and left.
I think the technical term for what OP did is "snap." Oh, she snapped. She'd put up with that man's disgusting behavior for so long that now that she had an out, she wasn't going to take it anymore.
I happen to think that what she did was awesome, but a former coworker thought quitting on the spot was out of line. Her new boss thinks what she did was awesome and that he deserved it, so I have a feeling she's going to like this new job a little more.
But she's now wondering if it was an a--hole move to quit on the spot and leave her fellow employees in the lurch, even if it was kind of worth it to see the look on her old boss's face.
The way I see it is that he did this to himself. Patterns of treating people terribly and not accepting his employee's resignation caused this situation, not OP, who was just trying to look out for herself. Commenters agreed.
"The way your former boss responded to your giving notice made my skin crawl. You were right not to accept condescension and harassment. Go enjoy your new, better job," one person wrote.
You're NTA at all," another person wrote. "You tried to do the right thing, he didn't accept it, called you condescending names, and tried to deny your autonomy. Sleep well knowing you're away from this monster. You did the best thing you could considering the circumstances."