People in Lockdown Are Exploring Their Kitchens and Finding Wildly Expired Products

Robin Zlotnick - Author
By

May 14 2020, Updated 7:50 a.m. ET

It all started with a viral tweet from Michael Patrick. He and his mom, like many others around the world, are stuck at home and becoming reacquainted — in detail — with their home kitchens. For Michael and his mom, this led to one gruesome discovery — a 25-year-old box of expired puff pastry. 

Soon, many others were sharing pictures of the wildly expired things they have in their pantries, freezers, and fridges, and reader, they are horrifying. Feast your eyes on these delicacies that no one should eat.

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I don't know what's worse: the fact that his mom had a 25-year-old box of puff pastry or that 1995 was 25 years ago. Oh no, the actual worst thing is that Michael's mom still planned to use it in a baking project and eat it. 

The puff pasty is older! Than both! Of! His! Siblings! And his siblings are grown adults in their 20s. That's terrifying. I simply cannot believe that she is actually going to eat this. I won't believe it 'til I see it.

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Welp. I saw it. And now I believe it. I suppose if it was frozen this whole time the only danger would be massive, disgusting freezer-burn taste? Right? Like, she's going to be OK. But I can't imagine it tasted very good.

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This is concerning because it looks really normal and actually kind of delicious, and if you were served this, you might not ever know that the puff pastry existed before the iPod, a device that they don't even make anymore. 

In any case, Michael and his mom's adventure with puff pastry inspired others to share the horrifically expired things they've found in their kitchens. And they're truly something else.

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He ate meat that had been in his freezer for 17 years! I cannot! There's no way they still stated good, especially if he microwaved them. I also can't imagine he felt very well after consuming them. That can't be safe. Can it?

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Wow. I mean, this can of ox tongues is another member of the family at this point. No matter how old and gross it is, it can never be thrown away. I think this can of ox tongues is what's keeping this family together.

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I cannot believe that someone kept a Kraft cheese spread with pineapple for over 30 years. Just imagining what that stuff smells like is making me gag. Yikes.

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On May 24, please observe a moment of silence for the person who is eating 10-year-old corn dogs that they found in their freezer. They will need all your prayers and well wishes. 

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Is that a rusted can of Pepsi? I need to know if there's still soda inside and if it's still drinkable. I wouldn't be surprised it it's just totally fine.

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No! I hate everything about this. First of all, American cheese is good for grilled cheese and grilled cheese only. Second of all, never reduced fat. Third of all, never expired American cheese from 2006. Fourth of all, I don't know what that dish is, but it's not mac and cheese and it should not be made with American cheese. Everything about this is troubling.

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I don't think cod liver oil smells good to begin with, but I imagine it smells extra terrible after sitting in a refrigerator for 33 years. Barf.

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What. Is. Potato. Bake? You know what? Don't answer that question. I don't want to know. I especially hate that whatever's in this jar has seemed to separate into a milky top layer and a juicy bottom layer. This is going to give me nightmares.

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First of all, I had no idea what "coffee whitener" was. I looked it up and it's non-dairy creamer. But the real mystery is how did this survive in this guy's shed for years before he even moved to his home. I feel like he can't throw this out or else he will be haunted by the coffee whitener for all his remaining years.

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The thought of chunky Bailey's Irish Cream is truly making a shiver run down my spine. I hate everything about this, especially the fact that they would have tried it if only they could pour it out.

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Not going to lie, I have a few fairly old containers of herbs in the back of my spice cabinet, but non of them are this old. This might be considered an antique at this point.

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