Woman Pressured by in-Laws to Play the Role of Server at Christmas Dinner

Allison DeGrushe - Author
By

Dec. 13 2023, Published 5:12 p.m. ET

While the holiday season is typically cherished for spending quality time with family, the reality may not always align with our expectations. A seemingly joyous festive gathering can unexpectedly transform into a tense affair marked by conflict. A case in point is a woman in the "Am I the A------" (AITA) subreddit navigating a clash with her in-laws.

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The original poster, who goes by the handle u/TravelnPookie, says her in-laws are throwing a holiday hissy fit because she doesn't want to play waitress at their Christmas dinner. OK, seriously?! Is it a crime to just want to spend time with the fam instead of juggling plates and forks? We don't think so!

Read on for more details, and stay tuned to hear what the internet has to say about this festive fiasco.

A young happy couple celebrates Christmas together.
Source: Getty Images
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A woman's in-laws want her to act as their server for Christmas dinner.

In the viral post, posted on Dec. 6, 2023, the OP revealed that her in-laws would be staying at her and her husband's house for Christmas. Although the couple proposed dining out for their Christmas dinner, OP generously offered to prepare a homemade feast. Regrettably, the in-laws declined the OP's offer, sparking an unexpected twist.

Following her corporate job layoff, the OP currently works as a server at a local restaurant. Despite the establishment being closed on Christmas Eve and Christmas, the OP's mother-in-law unexpectedly called and requested the OP be their server for the entire Christmas dinner.

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Redditor u/TravelnPookie revealed that she declined to act as a server at her in-laws Christmas dinner.
Source: Reddit / u/TravelnPookie

The OP was clueless about this secret arrangement until her husband spilled the beans, stating that his mom expects her to play server at their jolly family gathering. And what's her reward for this unexpected role? A hefty tip and some takeout goodies from her very own restaurant.

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"I politely declined because, let's be real, being excluded from Christmas dinner while working as their server? That's a hard pass from me," OP explained, and you know what? She's absolutely on point.

But hold on to your Santa hats! The in-laws aren't exactly thrilled with her rejecting the serving gig. They're convinced she's overreacting and insisting it's totally normal for her to play waitress at their Christmas feast.

So, what's the verdict? Is the OP the AH? Keep scrolling to hear what Redditors have to say!

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Reddit unanimously agreed that the OP's in-laws are the AH in this situation.

The now-viral post received over 2,500 comments from many fellow Redditors roasting the in-laws to a crisp (totally deserved, by the way). Everyone also agreed that the OP did the right thing in standing her ground and shutting down their crazy (and quite offensive) suggestion.

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"That's insulting and spiteful AF," reads the top comment. "And to say your gift is the tip and takeout?! What the ever-loving f--- kind of b------- is that?! I'd tell your boss that you request to not serve them, or switch with a co-worker, or call out last minute or something."

The OP agreed, replying, "I felt like it was very offensive and couldn't really understand why they thought it was weird that I said no. If the roles were switched, my family would never do that to their child-in-law. I've served my husband, friends, and family in the past, but not on a holiday where I was being isolated. I feel like I am being gaslit."

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"Oh, honey. They have shown their true feelings about you. You are the help. You are not good enough to share a meal with. They want to humiliate you and put you in your place," another Reddit user wrote. "Do not serve these people in the restaurant, in your home, anywhere. ... If they want a glass of water they need to get it for themselves. Do literally nothing for these people. ... This is outright disrespect and hostility."

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One person sadly said, "They're being pretty explicit about what they think of you, and it's [that you're not] family."

"So you're not good enough to cook for them or eat with them, but it's OK for you to wait on them hand and foot so they can give you a 'sweet tip' as a Christmas present...?" someone else stated. "Oh, hell no. My gift to them would be telling them to kiss my a--. ... Seriously that is a huge, stinking load of cow manure."

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The OP recently dropped a festive bombshell update on Reddit, revealing that she "took the opportunity to establish clear boundaries" with her in-laws. As expected, her MIL wasn't happy at all.

But fear not! OP's husband was the real MVP, standing by her side and even agreeing to uninvite everyone who supported such yuletide madness. Now, OP and her man are on a mission to craft a Christmas wonderland that's drama-free and positively jingle-all-the-way!

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