Sometimes things happen in life that can’t be explained. And when it comes to the topic of women’s health, miscarriages are at the top of that list. Planned Parenthood explains that while miscarriage usually happens early in pregnancy — eight out of 10 miscarriages happen in the first three months — the cause can be difficult to pinpoint. And while many women have been strong through their loss, it still takes a toll on their families.
NBC News correspondent Kate Snow has struggled with the effects of a miscarriage. While there is always hope that things will turn out better the next time, the experience is traumatic enough for some women to turn their back on being a mother completely. Even though Kate is already a mother of two kids, the pain was hard for her to overcome, and she opened up about her experiences recently.
Unfortunately, Kate has had two miscarriages over the last 11 years.
No words can explain just how difficult it is to deal with a miscarriage. Not only is it hard for the mother to deal with, but it can also easily leave mothers blaming themselves and feeling alone.
Per Today, Kate explained how emotionally taxing the experience is. “It was one of the most devastating sentences I’d ever heard,” she said.
“I felt deeply, intensely sad," she continued. "I was alone even though my husband Chris was clutching my hand. As tears streamed down my face, it felt like all the hope that I’d had of having a third child was evaporating as I looked at the stillness of a sonogram on the screen.”
Her first pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage happened in 2010. At the time, Kate was new to the NBC family and kept the news to herself and her husband Chris Bro.
And while Kate and Chris didn’t exactly plan to have another child, the news was exciting since she always wanted to have a third kid.
However, things took a turn and she experienced a miscarriage out of nowhere. “We adjusted to a new reality," she said. "And then — just as fast as it appeared — the dream was gone."
And while she told herself that she wouldn’t try again, two years later she found out that she was pregnant. This time around the couple decided to be open with their friends and family. However, things started to go downhill at the end of the first trimester.
“We learned that the fetus had Down syndrome," she said. “After another ultrasound, we learned that like many babies with Down syndrome, ours had a heart defect. The heart tissue hadn’t come together correctly, leaving a hole in the center of his heart. It was a boy. We decided to name him Max.”
The couple waited for two weeks for a test that would reveal how severe the heart condition was. Then they learned that Kate miscarried again. As you can imagine, it was a crushing blow.
Despite the miscarriage struggles, Kate and Chris have grown a bigger appreciation for their two children — Zack and Abby.
Having the ability to expand your family is a beautiful thing. And while many women suffer miscarriage after having kids, it can make some of them feel hopeless.
However, Kate went through all the emotions and realized that while the news was heartbreaking, she has a lot to be thankful for. And this all came after a point of feeling guilty that Zack and Abby weren’t enough.
“It’s taken me years to be able to say all of this out loud,” she explained. “And with distance, comes wisdom.”
It’s important to shed light on the topic of miscarriages. In fact, statistics show that 10-20 percent of pregnancies end in miscarriage.
The Mayo Clinic also shares that the actual number is likely higher because many miscarriages occur so early in pregnancy that a woman doesn't realize she's pregnant.
Many women have suffered in silence, but it’s important to know that you’re not alone. While it has been taboo to talk about, sharing your experiences with other women can serve as a form of healing for you and your family. And Kate is living proof of that.