Kendra Hilty's "In Love with My Psychiatrist" TikTok Series Is a "What Not to Do" Playbook

If you've ever seen a mental health professional, you know how vulnerable and raw the experience can be. You have to peel back the carefully crafted facade you present to the world and tell this stranger your darkest, most vulnerable feelings and thoughts.

This requires the mental health professional to be impeccably ethical, tending to their client's mental health needs while respecting their vulnerability and putting professional boundaries in place.

But a TikTok user named Kendra Hilty explains that she had a psychiatrist who not only failed to set professional boundaries, but encouraged an unhealthy relationship that took her years to understand.

Here's what Kendra said in her "I fell in love with my psychiatrist" series on TikTok.

In her TikTok series, Kendra alleges that her psychiatrist knew she had a crush on him and failed to respond appropriately. Not only that, but she alleges that he encouraged her and even caught feelings of his own.

While Kendra's story is harrowing and jaw-dropping, it's worth noting that her allegations are just that, allegations.

Throughout her series, which touched on a number of issues, Kendra described a situation where she quickly developed feelings for her psychiatrist, a man she described as being 38 when they met, "attractive," and "smart."

As she saw him for treatment of ADHD, she says he set her up for monthly appointments, despite only needing to be seen every three months.

Initially, their appointments were held virtually, but she eventually began attending appointments in person.

Kendra alleges that she admitted her crush to him, and he failed, over and over, she says, to put up boundaries and explain what transference is.

Transference is when a client begins to develop an emotional attachment to their therapist in lieu of attachment to a different figure of authority in their personal life, such as a romantic partner (via Psychology Today).

It can be present with or without countertransference, where the mental health professional might develop feelings for their client in a similar manner.

Kendra recalls discussing the situation with her ChatGPT, which she calls "Henry," and describing escalating feelings that only ground to a halt when the AI chatbot introduced her to the concept of transference.

Once realizing that she was in the midst of what she considered an unhealthy dynamic, Kendra left and wanted to speak out about the situation to help victims of other inappropriate mental health professional relationships.

As the series continued, Kendra filled in more details and described a situation where she was creating a relationship in her mind where there was a romantic connection between herself and her psychiatrist.

Regardless of whether the feelings were mutual, it's clear that her psychiatrist failed to recognize the situation for transference, set up a healthy boundary, and either help the client unpack and recognize those feelings in a healthy way, or end their professional relationship and set her up with a new professional.

Throughout all of this inappropriate situation, many people following along had one question: did she report him for violating professional boundaries?

Some have reached out to her to say they experienced the same thing, and encouraged her to reach out to a governing board that can investigate.

Kendra answered the question in one of her earliest videos, explaining, "he was so good at plausible deniability." She added that he never openly requested inappropriate behavior or openly encouraged her feelings, but he also failed to stop her and remind her that there was a professional relationship between them, not intimate.

She added, "I don't think he did anything that's reportable."

Many users took to TikTok to express their disgust at the situation, pushing for Kendra to report him even though she said she had not and did not believe his behavior was reportable.

But not everyone was in agreement. Many people accused Kendra of being "delusional" and suggested that she read more into the situation than actually existed. But even those people often noted that the psychiatrist failed to hold proper boundaries.

But between Kendra's inappropriate entanglement with her psychiatrist and reliance on her ChatGPT for advice, it's clear to most outsiders that she was vulnerable and in a position that required a strong mental health provider to check her behavior and keep those boundaries in place.

The entire series has raised many questions on social media, with people's opinions running the full gamut.

Ultimately, the internet can agree, providers have the utmost responsibility to maintain professional boundaries, always. But especially with vulnerable clients.