There are lots of ways to become a parent. Sometimes you find the love of your life and you stay with them forever and the two of you have children and things work out like a fairytale. Sometimes you find someone you're just cool living with and you have kids. Or sometimes, you have a one-night stand, get pregnant, and decide to keep the kid because you've always wanted a child of your own and don't know when you'll get another opportunity to become a parent.
We live in a day and age where families come in all shapes and sizes, and this Reddit poster, who chooses to remain anonymous, is starting a family by herself after getting pregnant from a one time sexual encounter.
After informing the man she slept with of the news, he wanted nothing to do with the woman and stopped talking to her completely. However, shortly after she prepared herself to be a mom of not one, but two new babies (twinsies!), she discovered the father was back in town, and a whole lot more. He revealed that he was married and didn't want his wife to find out about his adultery.
OP, without hesitation, acted fast to protect her unborn children.
Here's where things get sticky, however. She learned that the dude has five children with his wife, and because she filed for child support first, she would be entitled to more money than his other children should his wife choose to divorce him over his infidelity. Ouch.
What's makes matters worse is them man is now "obsessed" with the fact that one of the twins is a boy, his only son. On top of that, OP feels guilty for financially "trapping" the man's wife in a bad marriage. The wronged wife is a stay-at-home-mom and wouldn't receive enough in child support to take care of her kids if she left.
Though she could not care less about what happens to the dude, but is genuinely torn up over the situation this creates for his wife and wants to know if she's an a**hole for doing so.
Most folks on Reddit assured her that no, she is in no way the a**hole. If anything, the guy is for being married, not telling her, and not using protection, then completely ghosting OP and not enlightening her about the entire situation.
Others said she was merely looking out for her own children, and any other mother would be exactly the same.
Others thought that the priority system set in place for child support is to blame, and that spawned a great conversation on the state of the family court system.
What do you think? Does OP have nothing to feel bad for? Or is it all on Mr. Military Cheater who thought he would just ignore the issue and it would sort itself out?