There are few situations more vulnerable than when you're sitting down on the toilet, going about your business.
Even with the advent of smartphones and mindless Instagram/Reddit scrolling during said porcelain throne-activities, it's easy to imagine someone or something is creeping on you in the bathroom.
And when it comes to being surprised by something during personal toilet time, it doesn't get worse than being surprised by a spider. Heck, being in any type of confined space with an arachnid is probably on the top of everyone's nightmare list. Adding the whole element of dropping a deuce just intensifies the horror.
This guy's story of his own 8-legged encounter while in the bathroom combines all the elements of scary/embarrassing freak outs. Not only did it happen at work, but the spider was in the toilet and tickled parts of his body no person would ever want tickled by wildlife. Unless, you know, you're into that sort of thing. And if you are I'm totally judging you because, eww. Gross.
To top it all off, he yelps at the top of his lungs, and smashes the spider, causing some collateral damage. If you're wondering just how a huntsman spider managed to find its way into a toilet bowl, you have to remember this occurred in Australia, which I'm sure translates to "monster island" in most languages.
Even though he killed the spider (and hurt himself royally in the process) he still had to deal with the aftermath of the whole ordeal: dealing with the concerned coworkers who heard his blood-curdling cries for help. He did his best to turn them away and avoid making it into a big "thing."
Then, in what we'll call a moment of weakness, he decides to tell his coworkers exactly what happened. They — being caring, understanding individuals who aren't the kind to relish in another person's misery — chuckled about it for a bit and then forgot the whole thing.
Kidding. Even his boss got in on the laughter and called our unfortunate protagonist to his office, presenting him with a form to complete.
It's an official HR complaint putting the spider's "sexual" misconduct on blast. They even put the word "poopitrator" on it and instructed him to specify that all eight of the spider's hands were involved in the groping/fondling incident. What a great boss.
While the unfortunate fellow in our tale has to live with the trauma of being ambushed by a spider in a toilet bowl, at least he can rest easy knowing he's working in an office full of people who definitely know how to take/make a joke. Sure it's at his own expense, but I'd much rather be working with a group who's got a sense of humor.
But it also sounds like they've got a spider problem so I hope they get an exterminator in there ASAP.
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