We all have useless things we carry around with us, either for sentimental reasons or even sometimes for no reason at all. I have a keychain with beads that spell my name on my keys that my softball teammate made when I was a senior in high school. I've had it on my keys ever since then, just sort of...waiting for it to fall off, if I'm being honest. I never expected it to last this long (that is, um, 12 years now), but apparently, it is the world's most well-made keychain. And I'm not just going to take it off. That would be absurd!
With that spirit in mind, these are the most useless things that the people of Reddit carry around with them at all times.
A cowboy picture
OK, this is a weird one. When flubbererotica was in Arizona a few years ago, they bought a metal spider sculpture off an old man on the side of the road...as one does in Arizona. Then, they explain, "as a receipt he gave me a wallet-sized printed picture of him sitting proudly atop a horse, with a big white cowboy hat and he signed the back and wrote the dollar amount. I still have his picture in my wallet today."
MeatloafSnipe carries a small marble turtle named Harold with them at all times. In 2015, they bought Harold for $2 on a family vacation in the Bahams and put him in their pocket. He's been there ever since.
This one is quite sad, but also very sweet. TWFM carries an old key that belonged to their late sister. They found it when they were cleaning out her house when she was in hospice care, and she was never able to tell them what it opened. They still carry the key with them "just in case I ever run into a lock that it fits."
Tiny Optimus Prime
Doesnt_reallymatter was waiting tables one day, and a young kid accidentally left a tiny Optimus Prime toy figure on the table. So they put it in their apron, and it's been there for about two years.
This one started out useful and became more useless with time. Delightfullydemented started carrying around a stuffed bunny at the suggestion of their therapist to help with their anxiety. Although they don't really need it anymore, they still carry it around because why not?
Dgatz12 always carries around a tiny blacklight keychain, which they say has no use at all, but it could come in handy if they ever stay in a hotel room and for some reason decide they need to know just how gross it really is!
Didn't everyone collect weird, cool-looking rocks when we were kids? Well, Ksh1218 still does that. They wrote that they have at least two rocks in every single bag they own.
LibertyPrimeExample has been carrying around two quarters at all times since they were a kid. It started at their mother's insistence in case they needed to call her during the day. Presumably, this is when payphones still existed. Payphones are a thing of the past, but I guess you never know when you'll need quarters to pay a parking meter!
Sdemat has this foldable wallet insert in their wallet at all times. It's a reference sheet about what to do in the event of a biological, nuclear, or chemical attack. It hasn't come in handy yet, but that doesn't mean it never will.
Old house key
Nostalgia is real, folks. ThatGuyFromOhio still carries around the key to the house they grew up in, even though they changed the locks years ago. It's just a lovely reminder of their childhood and their family.
TheOtherOboe carries with them a small plastic snail that they found in their school parking lot. The snail's name is Aaron, and he lives in their bassoon case. "I set him on my stand during concerts," they wrote. "He's very well-behaved and never interrupts the concert."
I know plenty of people who carry guitar picks around with them at all times. The only thing that's strange about the fact that SomeDankIdiot does it is that they don't play the guitar.
Hospital parking pass
This is precious. Ilik3poooing carries around the parking pass from the hospital from the day that their daughter was born. I'm not crying; you're crying!
WatchMeBeAKlutz carries around a Chinese coupon for a large boba that expired in 2014, when they visited Suzhou. They live in the U.S., so it is extra useless here.
Old driver's license
I relate to this one. One-Stab carries around their old driver's license. Similarly, I carry around my college ID from the school I graduated from many years ago. It doesn't have a date on it, so sometimes I can still get student deals!
MrHobob carries around their Blockbuster account card even though it's been years since Blockbusters have even existed. I get the impulse though! It used to be such a fun event to go rent movies.
Nostromos_Cat carries with them a small Ammonite fossil that their son gave them. I wouldn't be able to carry this around because it would mesmerize me too much and I wouldn't do anything else except look at it and feel it.
Macandoodle carries hair ties around with them, which would be normal except for the fact that he's a guy with short hair and doesn't use them...ever. But he has been around enough women to know that they will eventually need a hair tie. What a guy.
I love this one. Wieners69696969 carries around a straw wrapper that their husband gave them once and jokingly told them never to lose. They haven't lost it in the last four years, and they don't plan on losing it anytime soon.
Thisbuttonsucks carries around this adorable little creature at all times, and I don't blame them. Even just looking at him makes me smile.
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