People Share the Worst Ways They've Been Dumped

Robin Zlotnick - Author

Jun. 27 2019, Updated 7:46 a.m. ET

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Every once in a while, it's important to remember how good you have it. And one of the ways you can easily do that today is my reading these stories of the world's worst breakups. Because at least these nightmare situations didn't happen to you. 

Sure, we've all had a relationship end badly here and there. But the stories on this AskReddit thread are truly next-level. This thread has everything: post-sex breakups (crazily enough, more than one!), Romeo and Juliet level misunderstandings, preteen heartbreak, and decade-long marriages dissolving instantly in one text. The drama is real, and it's right here, in this Reddit thread.

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Sometimes, they run away. Literally.

"He literally ran away," idlewildgirl wrote. They got back from a gig they were at together, she went to put their ice cream in the freezer, and that's when she heard footsteps and the door slamming. "Ran out and he was legging it down the road." No warning. No explanation! What?! My question is... did he ever come back? Did they ever get to talk about their relationship and address what went wrong? Or was he just gone forever? 

Apparently, this isn't all that uncommon. 

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Scarletnightingale's sister's ex did the same running away thing multiple times. Often it would be about something he would bring up and then decide was too much for him to handle. "So he might say, 'Hey, we should move in together,' if she agreed instead of straight telling him no, then he might literally run away." 

This is beyond infuriating! It really sounds like these dudes need some serious therapy to help them be able to confront tough situations. 

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Then, there's the post-sex breakup trend.

This is wild. Tzaddik_1726 wrote, "She told me she didn't want to be married anymore while we were gasping and recovering from sex." I guess she wanted to get in one last good sesh before she blew up both their lives, but that just strikes me as insanely cruel. At least wait until the both of you are dressed and no longer out of breath. Or, here's an idea! Don't have sex with the person you're about to break up with at all. 

I really don't understand why people do this. Personally, I don't think I'd be in the mood to get it on with someone I didn't want to be with anymore. But apparently it's a thing. LumpySpaceDingus's first relationship ended like this. They were 17 and in an eight month relationship. They were lying naked in their bed when he said, "I don't love you. I never did. I just wanted to have fun." 

WOW, talk about harsh. 

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This woman traveled five hours by train to blow up her boyfriend's life.

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This one is a real doozy. AkariAkaza wrote that his girlfriend traveled on a train for five hours to get to his house, tell him she doesn't love him, and break up with him. Sure, you might be saying, "At least she wanted to do it person, right?" No. I'm telling you, there were ulterior motives at work here.

He's broken up about it, so 15 minutes after she leaves he calls his best friend to see if he wants to hang out and take his mind off the breakup. And then he hears her, the girl who just dumped him, in the background. She really traveled five hours so she could break up with him and then immediately go hook up with his best friend. He lost two relationships that awful day. 

If you think that's crazy, though, wait 'til you hear this one. B4rn5ey was with his girlfriend for just under two years when everything fell apart. She had told him that she lived at home with her mom, who was dying of terminal cancer. He never went over there because her mom supposedly didn't want to bring anyone new into her life, knowing that she wouldn't be around for much longer.

One night, he got a message from a random guy, explaining that this was a total lie. Her mom was fine. She was engaged to this guy and living with him the whole time. They were supposed to be getting married in a few weeks. At least they both discovered the truth about their mutual significant other before it went any further!

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I don't know what's crazier, though. Being lied to by a complete psychopath, or being told by your wife on a date night out, after 13 years of marriage and two kids, that she just wants to be friends. Ouch times a thousand. This is what happened to stellarbeing. His wife really whispered, "Let's just be friends" to him while they were in a fancy club one night.

I don't know what I'd do if I was in that position. Probably what he did, which was say, "That's a really weird thing to say to me," go back to the hotel, and go to bed. He never really got an explanation. They got divorced, and he moved on.

This person left their SO while they were in the hospital. Brutal.

Shinyhappycat wrote that their partner cheated on them with five different women in 10 days. As if that wasn't already bad enough, she did it while shinyhappycat was in the hospital. Having brain surgery. She dumped her two days after she got out of the hospital, "whilst at her parents' house, on Christmas Day." 

Talk about blow after blow after blow. This story kept getting worse with every single word!

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The next saga is, as I promised, some real Romeo and Juliet stuff. This woman hit him with a car, and that's pretty much how greyz3n knew it was over. But how did they get to that point? Well, he wrote that they both made several small bad decisions that led to them both cheating on each other because they thought the other had. 

She thought he cheated when he hadn't, so she went ahead and cheated. Then, since she cheated, he cheated as revenge. Seems like this relationship had some deeper issues that were never going to get resolved.

Unfortunately, sometimes the truth comes out at the Dairy Queen drive-thru.

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Awhq was working at the Dairy Queen when a girl from her high school comes through the drive-thru window. As she's handing her the order, she notices she's wearing the exact ring she had given to her boyfriend. Turns out Bob, the boyfriend, was also seeing that other girl. The girl returned the ring and left immediately.

A few minutes later, Bob comes to Dairy Queen and starts yelling. Hilarious, since he's the one who cheated and gave the ring she gave him to someone else. It was only resolved when Bob's friend Mike, who happened to be at the Dairy Queen, calmed his friend down and made him apologize.

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It's not uncommon for people to make a scene when they break up. I don't know why... Maybe they think that the other person won't react badly in public or something. But it never turns out well. KhaosElement was broken up with on their birthday, at their birthday party, in front of everyone. That's the worst thing I've heard, and my grandfather's funeral was on my 16th birthday, so I know a thing or two about ruined birthdays.

Another botched public breakup for ya: Babers1987's acquaintance (they're very careful not to call him their "friend") recently broke up with his fiancée by taking her to a really upscale restaurant and asking for the ring back in the middle of dinner. Not the smartest move, dude! By a long shot! Needless to say, she lost it and cried in the middle of the dining room at this fancy place. 

I know it probably doesn't feel like it right now, but someday she's going to realize she dodged a bullet.

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Middle school breakups really take the cake, though.

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"My first boyfriend broke up with me in his basement while both our moms were upstairs 10 minutes into a two-hour Tupperware party," wrote ManicAcroNymph. I bet it's hilarious now. I mean, that's a really good story. But it was probably not at all funny at the time, and especially not funny for the next one hour and 50 minutes, while they still had to hang out together. 

Young love is so fickle, so cruel, so restricted to basements while moms do their thing upstairs.

Similarly, o-Bird's friend brutally broke up with his girlfriend when they were about 11 years old. The friend invited his girlfriend to meet him at the spot where they would usually hang out after school. He and his friend then hid behind a hedge until she arrived. When she got there, he shouted, "You're dumped!"

How awful is that?! She cried and ran home. At least "22 years later, he still feels guilty." Yeah, he should. 

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