Vanessa and Xander's Relationship Is Continuously Tested on 'The Ultimatum: Queer Love' (SPOILERS)

Chrissy Bobic - Author
By

Jun. 7 2023, Updated 6:28 a.m. ET

Xander and Vanessa embrace on 'The Ultimatum: Queer Love'
Source: Netflix

Spoiler warning: This article contains major spoilers for Season 1 of The Ultimatum: Queer Love.

Going on reality TV to test your partner is hard. And The Ultimatum: Queer Love cast members Vanessa and Xander might know that better than almost anyone.

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They start off the season on the Netflix series with others accusing Vanessa of being fake and Xander wanting to defend her girlfriend despite needing to come on the show to make Vanessa commit. And it's hard not to wonder if Vanessa and Xander are even still together after The Ultimatum: Queer Love.

Vanessa and Xander have a serious talk outside by the pool on 'The Ultimatum: Queer Love'
Source: Netflix
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Are Vanessa and Xander still together after 'The Ultimatum: Queer Love'?

Netflix producers must have given Vanessa and Xander a crash course in keeping their relationship under wraps until the season is over, because neither of their respective Instagram accounts give anything away. But after the finale dropped on Netflix, viewers saw their somewhat amicable breakup.

They knew each other for years, dating back to high school, before they got together. Well, to be fair, Vanessa and Xander's respective boyfriends were their common link in high school and years later, the pair reconnected. But at the time of filming for the show, they were together for four years and knew each other longer than that.

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And when the majority of the cast points out flaws they see in Vanessa, Xander is quick to come to her defense despite the ultimatum and the reason they went on the show. Because of all of that, we are inclined to believe that there's still a good chance Vanessa and Xander make it.

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In Episode 9, when Xander and Vanessa sit down to suss out what they want to do now, at decision time, Xander admits that she will always love Vanessa. But, she adds, "you deserve a lot more than what i can offer you right now."

Vanessa, to her credit, understands why they have to break up.

"Thank you for our four years together. They changed me," she tells Xander. "I don't know who I would be without those four years with you. I will always love you. You're the reason I know what love is."

She adds, "We'll meet again if it's right and it might be at s taco truck. Or it might be in another life where we're both birds."

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Yoly talks to Xander about her feelings on 'The Ultimatum: Queer Love'
Source: Netflix

In the second batch of episodes, which dropped on Netflix on May 31, the couples get together for a mixer. At first, Xander and Yoly play it coy, but they can't help themselves. Eventually, they're drawn to each other and they even hold hands and casually talk about leaving together now, as opposed to in a week, when they are supposed to make their final decisions about their partners.

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Luckily, Vanessa doesn't seem to take their intimate and hushed conversations too hard. And in the end, Vanessa appears to be in support of whatever makes Xander happy, even if it means giving up their four years together.

Vanessa is accused of being on 'The Ultimatum' for "the wrong reasons."

Shortly before the cast gets together to pick who they each want to spend the next three weeks with on The Ultimatum: Queer Love, Lexi accuses Vanessa of being fake. She says that Vanessa is here for clout. There's even a shot of Vanessa telling someone at a cocktail party that she's an "influencer."

But Xander explains to the rest of the group that she knows who her girlfriend is. And to be fair, Xander and Vanessa do have the longest relationship out of everyone in the cast. But the experiment doesn't always work out for long-term couples. And even though they split up, there is clearly a permanent non-romantic love between them.

The Ultimatum: Queer Love is now streaming on Netflix.

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