Demi Lovato on Their Sexuality: "I Am Too Gay to Marry a Man Right Now"

Michelle Stein - Author

May 20 2021, Updated 11:25 a.m. ET

Demi Lovato
Source: Instagram

Since the release of Dancing With the Devil, Demi Lovato has popped up in headlines left and right. The singer started dating Max Ehrich in March of 2020, announced their engagement in July, and then called it off by late September. They've also been more open about how they identify sexually, as well as their gender identity. By now, fans might find themselves a bit confused about where Demi falls on the spectrum.

So is Demi Lovato gay, or do they prefer a different label entirely?

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Demi Lovato came out as non-binary in May 2021.

On May 19, 2021, Demi revealed that they identify as non-binary on her podcast 4D with Demi Lovato.

"I want to take this moment to share something very personal with you," she said in a clip of the podcast posted to Instagram. "The past year and a half, I've been doing some healing and self-reflective work. And through this work, I've had this revelation that I identify as nonbinary. With that said, I'll officially be changing my pronouns to they/them."

demi lovato pansexual
Source: Demi Lovato/YouTube
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They added: "I feel this best represents the fluidity I feel in my gender expression and allows me to feel most authentic and true to the person I both know I am and am still discovering."

Is Demi Lovato gay?

On March 27, 2021, Demi Lovato appeared on Joe Rogan’s podcast and confirmed that they identify as pansexual. The singer, who has been open about their sexual fluidity in the past, told EW that after ending their engagement with their ex-fiance, Max Ehrich, they realized that they're interested in marrying a man at this time.

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is demi lovato gay
Source: Instagram

Demi revealed, "Regardless if drama is happening or not, I am too gay to marry a man right now. I don't know if that will change in 10 years and I don't know if that'll never change, but I love accepting myself."

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For quite some time, the singer preferred not to comment on their sexuality. However, Demi "came out" as bisexual without actually saying they're bisexual in September 2015. They were making an appearance on the British late-night talk show Alan Carr: Chatty Man when Alan asked Demi if the lyrics, "Got a taste for the cherry, I just need to take a bite," in their song "Cool for the Summer" was about being a lesbian.

"I am not confirming and I'm definitely not denying," they replied. "All of my songs are based off of personal experiences. I don't think there's anything wrong with experimentation at all."

Alan (who is openly gay) responded, "I experimented once and it stuck."

"Hey, I didn't say that it didn't stick either. I didn't say that it didn't stick," Demi said, which elicited applause from the studio audience.

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Source: Alan Carr: Chatty Man/YouTube

It wasn't until 2017 — in their YouTube documentary Simply Complicated — when Demi first publicly (and directly) stated they were open to dating both men and women. They later clarified their sexuality during an interview for the cover of InStyle magazine. “I’m very fluid,” they explained. “I think love is love. You can find it in any gender. I like the freedom of being able to flirt with whoever I want.”

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Demi Lovato knew they were queer from a young age.

On Oct. 11, 2020 — National Coming Out Day — Demi hosted Facebook Watch's special Coming Out 2020. That's when they shared with co-host Tan France when they first knew they were queer.

demi lovato lesbian
Source: Getty Images
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"It was definitely when I was young and should not have been watching Cruel Intentions but I did, and it was that scene where they made out on the park lawn," Demi said of the kiss shared by Sarah Michelle Gellar and Selma Blair in the 1999 movie. "I was just like, 'Oh, wait a minute. I really like that.' I was like, 'I want to try it!'"

"And then, when I was like, 17, I did get down with that, and that's when I knew," they continued. "You want the tea? That's it!"

Demi went on to say, "There were times I wrote songs about girls that my fans thought I wrote about guys. I'm surprised that some of them didn't figure out that some of the songs were for certain people. I was sharing it with the world, yet I wasn't being completely obvious with what I was talking about. Music was my safe space."

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Source: Instagram

Circling back to the original question at hand, from what they have publicly stated, Demi identifies as pansexual or sexually fluid, meaning a person's sex/gender doesn't necessarily influence whether or not they are attracted to them.

And you know what? Good for them for being brave enough to openly share this part of who they are.

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