You May Not Be Ready for the Meaning Behind the British Slang Phrase "Touching Cloth"

You might not have heard the exact phrase "touching cloth" before, but chances are, you've heard something close to it. But if you have heard the term before, which is believed to be British slang, then you might already know what it means, based on the context in which you heard it said in real life or on social media.

So, what does "touching cloth" actually mean? In short, it's slightly NSFW, but only if you're a little squeamish. Once you understand the meaning behind the phrase, and why people say it, "touching cloth" does make more sense. But it might also make you wonder why this specifically is used to describe something at all.

According to Urban Dictionary, touching cloth refers to having to use the bathroom so badly that your poop is actually coming out and, well, touching your underpants. It's not the most eloquent way to describe an incident like that, but it's believed by some to be British slang that has been used across social media. So, for those who have never heard it, an explanation is needed.

"It verbalises the possible condition that the lead end of a s--t has protruded beyond the opening of the anus and has made contact with their undergarment," Urban Dictionary further explains, of the touching cloth slang term.

You don't have to like it, or even use the phrase yourself, but it's definitely a thing.

But Brits aren't above coming up with new sayings that also mean touching cloth. In a Reddit thread, a user shared "updated 'touching cloth' euphemisms" based on paint colors.

These included "gentle nudge," "anchors aweigh," and "brown bunny." Look, no one ever said that phrases related to being too late to go to the bathroom are going to be mature in any way.

In case you haven't had your fill of the "touching cloth" turn of phrase, some people joke that a "turtle head is poking out" to describe the same thing. Others might say, according to Urban Thesaurus, that they are "crowning." Yes, similar to giving birth, but in this case, it means almost defecating in your pants.

Someone might also say they are "prairie dogging." This is specifically used to describe the visual of a prairie dog poking its head out of its hole and then going back in.

As in, per Urban Dictionary, "When a person has to take a dump REAL bad, it wants to come out, but you force it back in with your butt muscles."

You might be able to visualize that when it comes to needing to go to the bathroom, but having a hard time actually, well, going. And, if you heard the phrase "pushing cloth," that's apparently the same as touching cloth. Hey, at least it has a meaning based on bathroom activities and not something even worse that would be considered NSFW by some.