People Are Sharing Why They Broke Up With the Partners They Thought They'd Marry

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PUBLISHED Oct. 1 2018, 4:26 p.m. ET

breakup
Source: istock

If you've considered having a forever-partnership with your significant other, you probably think you know a lot about them. First of all, you're probably wrong (sorry). But even still, you guys probably go together like peanut butter and jelly, considering you've been together all this time and want a future and maybe children and a house, etc. 

So it might interest you to read about other people, people who weren't as lucky in love as you are, who ended up breaking up with the person they thought was their "one" and opening up to reddit about their tales. Come on, who doesn't love to read about the romantic misfortunes of people online? 

For the most part, these stories will probably have you thinking GOOD RIDDANCE, even though you know deep down that none of these writers would be who they are today if it hadn't been for these insane stories that shaped them. Crazy how the world works, huh?

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1. The impulsive cheater.

cheater
Source: istock
She cheated. After like, five years. Super random.
But she told me about it right away, which took guts. I appreciated the honesty even though I didn't appreciate the [sleeping with] another dude.
So, we broke up. I was like, thanks for telling me, makes me way less mad at you, but still. I gotta jet.
Few years later we caught up at a party. She said she was scared because she saw me as her future husband and it freaked her out so she sabotaged it. Makes sense. Doesn't change anything, but good to know.
We parted as friends. I married someone else. So did she.

- SerenasBallFuzz

2. The engagement ring thrower.

engagementring
Source: istock
Every time we fought she would throw her engagement ring somewhere, make me get it, then make me plead with her to put it back on. Even for very small disagreements and even in public. That was the final straw. It was very a [screwed] up feeling begging somebody to be with me all the time. It gave me huge insecurity issues.
That was on top of the fact she began to call me names and hit me a lot. It all started after we got engaged for some reason. Things were so perfect but as soon as she got that ring everything changed. Suddenly she [was] what I mentioned along with calling me a loser, piece of [crap], and ugly a lot.

- Anti_Social_

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3. The unbothered liar.

liar
Source: istock
Found credit card statement on the floor once, just before a family holiday. Thousands in debt that he'd never told me about. I'd been paying the rent entirely by myself in a job I hated and I was too young and naïve (23) to realize he wasn't an honest man. That was it.

- stringParameter

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4. The over-involved mom.

mil
Source: istock
I was engaged to a guy I'd dated for three years and planning a destination wedding. He cheated with a mutual friend, and his mom (who he lived with while we were apartment hunting) accidentally walked in on them in the middle of it while letting the dogs out. He didn't know his mom had seen, but his mom called me and told me what happened. He denied it when I confronted him, which made it worse. Called off the wedding and broke up, etc.
Weirdly enough, he got married about five years later to someone else in the exact same destination wedding location/venue/package/colors I had always dreamed of and planned out for us. He must have kept my planning binder and just reused it or something.

- St3phiroth

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5. The girl who fell in love with the best friend.

bestfriend
Source: iStock
She was in love with my best friend. And they were both in denial about it. They were engaged a month after we broke up.
They both told me nothing physical happened and I believe them but they hung out a lot (which was pretty normal because we were all friends in high school) and I'm pretty sure they were already emotionally involved because she started to drift away (emotionally). They were both nice about it and asked if I'd be okay. I said yes because they seemed like they would be happy together and I cared about them both but I don't hang out with them all that much because as nice as I try to be about it I still feel betrayed. I still talk to my best friend every once in a while but it doesn't ever really get any deeper than the 'what are you up to these days?' texts.
And for everyone commenting been there and me too: I'm truly sorry. I sincerely believe that there's someone for everyone. Whoever you lost wasn't that person. As they say in Meet the Robinsons: "Keep moving forward."

- Cptcrispo

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6. The would-be Thanksgiving guest.

thanksgiving
Source: istock
My mom was dying. It was my last Thanksgiving with her. Without discussing it with me first, he had his mom buy him plane tickets to spend Thanksgiving with his parents, and asked if I wanted to go with him. No. I am not missing the last Thanksgiving I can ever spend with my mom. We will have our whole lives to spend Thanksgiving with your family after this. You’re leaving me to face this one alone, or to abandon my mother on her last Thanksgiving?
It was suddenly very clear (being happy to cancel wedding plans to do it later, and many other things) that he didn’t want to be in a relationship with me, but wouldn’t break up with me, because my mom was dying, and he was too nice a guy to dump his fiancée who’s mom was dying.
To his credit, we remained close friends, and he continued to be there as my best friend and emotional support through her death, and some months following. Although it was eight years ago, we still chat/text a few times a year, and catch up on how our families are doing.

- WooRankDown

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7. This piece of trash.

depressed
Source: istock
I found out the guy was no longer working when I called to see why his paychecks hadn’t come in. (I handled the finances for us, and he kept saying his boss would be sending it.) It turned out he quit, and instead of telling me, spent the next few weeks pretending to work. Instead he started going to strip clubs on what little money he had hoarded.
When I went to break it off with him, he punched his hand through the wall and lost his mind. By the time he finally calmed down, he had turned strangely morose. He looked at me and asked if we could have sex one last time.
My response: “No.”
Him after a long pause, sifting through his pockets and holding out a dollar bill: “I’ll pay you a dollar to sleep with me. It’s all I have left.”
Needless to say, he left with a dollar in his pocket and no final goodbye.

- ValNTine

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8. The "one day" dude.

flight
Source: istock
I moved across the world for him. He kept telling me “one day I want to propose.” Or “I can’t wait for you to be my wife.” That proposal never came, and I was having visa issues, so after a few years I gave up and moved back.

- DoYouMindIfWe

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9. The army distraction.

army
Source: istock
We had been dating for three years, constantly talked about getting married and what our life will be like. He went back into the military and wouldn’t commit to having a long distance relationship with me. Because it would be “way too distracting when he’s in the field and I pop up on his mind” and he didn’t want to commit to a relationship while in the army. So we broke it off.
The real kicker is that a couple months after being away in another state, he started dating a new girl who apparently lives in the same state as me. So. Lol.

- collapse-collide

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10. The Disney adorer.

disney
Source: iStock
She wanted to go to Florida for the Disney college program. (She is a huuuge Disney nerd.) She was too scared she would lose me. I convinced her to do it because if she didn't, she would regret it forever and that no matter what happened I would still be here for her. Six months and an engagement ring later she told me that while in Florida she realized she didn't love me like she thought she had. The ring is in a box in the back of a drawer in my dresser. Her worst fear came true. So did mine.

- devildrugsguy420

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11. The guy who's obsessed with preexisting conditions.

diabetes
Source: istock
He broke up with me. I have had juvenile diabetes since I was 7 years old and he said he did not want to marry someone who had health problems and could die. I was 26 and we had been together over three years. It had a big impact on me.
Note... my health was not bad at the time.

- bwakul

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12. The guy who didn't love her, plain and simple.

nolove
Source: istock
After two years of constantly forgiving him for cheating on me, it wasn't until I needed to be hospitalized that I realized he didn't love me. When I needed him the most he told me, "I'm sorry, I can't take you being in there. It makes me too sad. Call me when you get out." So when I did, I told him I just wanted to be friends, but I had nothing against him. Literally a day after I called him and told him that, he made [a] FB official post dating some other girl lol I'm married now and really happy in my relationship. I definitely dodged a bullet. 

- wanderingcat72

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13. The accident survivor.

hospital
Source: istock
Tragedy.
Keeping this as short as possible. But an accident happened and she had a severe brain injury, which led to me meeting her family that she had been trying very diligently to hide from me.
Her mother was an addict (to what I never really found out, but it was pills and illegal drugs that I never found the names of), and she constantly threatened me and my family with terrible things. She was after money and would do anything to get it. There was a settlement involved with the accident, and quite a bit of money was given to help with the recovery. Instead, the mother bought herself and the sister two brand new cars.
I met her father (adopted, the biological father is still a mystery) who was also a victim to her mother. His life was in complete shambles. He invited me over and wanted to have some beer with me and talk (he was a severe alcoholic, but nice). He told me that I need to leave as soon as I could, because the mom and sister were 100 percent going to ruin my life. I had already suspected this, but he told me, "I know you see my life, it will be yours too if you don't do something and save yourself."
He gave me his permission to leave, and told me he wouldn't think that I was a piece of [crap] for leaving my now mentally disabled girlfriend. A lot of people ended up thinking I was (the mother and sister didn't help this at all), and he warned me that this was probably going to happen. Which is why he wanted to give me his permission — he knew I'd stick with it and have my life destroyed because I was afraid of the image it might give me if I left.
And that was it. I was gone. It was terribly difficult and there was no "right" answer for what to do.

- blindguardian007

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14. The gaslighting abuser.

abuse
Source: istock
Tbh I’m pretty sure he lost his mind.
He was constantly accusing me of cheating, going through my phone and emails, jumping down my throat if I ran late at work. Calling my work when he found something he felt was incriminating to berate me and threaten to throw me out.
He took texts and emails he found between me and another guy, whom I was dating during a nine-month period where we’d broken up, and used that to berate me and call me [promiscuous] because even though we were BROKEN UP “we still meant something to each other and I shouldn’t have done it.”
He was so cruel. He’d put me down and make me cry, then mock me for it. Anytime I tried to defend myself he’d tell me he was the only thing standing between me and standing in line at the Salvation Army and to be careful how I spoke to him.
I was on my knees at one point, begging and crying for him not to leave me. I loved that man like a senseless fool.
Everything kind of blew up when I went to the beach for a day with a friend and he basically accused me of [sleeping] my way up and down the coast.
It was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I couldn’t do it anymore. I had reached the event horizon for my tolerance of emotional manipulation and abuse.
Huge argument ensued, we broke up. I got home and he’d already packed my [stuff] and I left right then.
I was homeless for a bit, but I had my dignity and self-respect back.

- charlottedhouse

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15. The dude from the wrong caste and religion.

caste
Source: iStock
After four years of relationship, her parents couldn't come to terms with my religion and caste, they completely opposed our marriage, the girl couldn't sacrifice her parents' relationship and so she sacrificed me for them. Welcome to 21st century India.

- marzneo

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16. The obsessive control freak.

ocd
Source: istock
He was obsessed in making me look/speak better. He would control my food intake and make me exercise every day. Whenever I was out with him, I'd have to wear heels... Dress well and he would point out what other girls were wearing and that I should try on. Putting make up is a must even when I'm on a plane.
I wasn't allow to speak other language aside from English and not allowed to watch dramas that is trash to him.
My last straw was him asking me to consider to get a boob job when I lost so much weight from all the exercise/controlled diet. I realized I cannot live this way anymore and he will never be satisfied ever.
Even though I still love him but I was mentally drained and constantly felt that I was ugly and unworthy.

- Cutestuff_

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17. The high school sweethearts.

highschool
Source: istock
We moved in together too young, and tried to be adults too fast. I should’ve known things were not going to work out when he tried to convince me to buy a house with him at 19. NINETEEN. (In Southern California. On two retail employees’ wages. Like, WHAT?!?)
We were high school sweethearts. He was smart and ambitious. But he also loved to spend money, and worked insane hours to try to make up the deficit. After we moved in together, his work schedule changed so I was working morning shifts, and would literally pass him in the driveway as he left for his night shifts. There would be several days in a row where we wouldn’t see each other, and when we did see each other we were too broke to do anything fun.
We went on a trip with his family after a big fight, where I begged him to not ask me to marry him. I told him I wasn’t sure how I felt anymore, I was unhappy, he seemed unhappy. I wasn’t stupid. I knew why he suddenly wanted to know my ring size. I hadn’t been happy for months, and had become a workaholic to try to keep up with the expenses.
I wanted to see if the vacation would bring a spark back into our relationship, then maybe we could work ourselves back into normalcy.
He didn’t listen, and asked me to marry him in front of his entire family and surrounded by strangers, hundreds of miles away from home. I was 21, and had no idea how to say no. Our engagement lasted nine days, because that’s all I could stomach while thinking about spending my life with someone I wasn’t in love with.
I have no idea what he’s up to now, but I’ve found my soulmate so I’m peachy keen.

- yesitisnicole

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