Almost every character in Big Mouth makes some really questionable choices, but we understand the tweens because we’ve all been through middle school. Lola Ugfuglio Skumpy (yes, that is her real name) is a conundrum of a character, and probably the most absurd Bridgerton student there is. At the same time, her difficult past provides some insight into her motivation.
Lola's sex-positive personality and unique voice (Nick Kroll) make her one of the funniest and most lovable characters in all of Big Mouth. So here are seven of her best quotes throughout the show’s five seasons.
#7 — Season 3, Episode 2
When the girls of Bridgerton Middle School band together to protest the dress code, Lola naturally has something hilarious to say. When the inappropriate teacher instructs them to go into the classroom for punishment, saying “OK, girls,” Lola aptly responds, “We’re not girls, we’re ladies!” And as she trips, she ironically continues, “F--k my c--k-sucking ankle.”
#6 — Season 4, Episode 7
During Nick’s galactic fantasy, Lola naturally shows up to bring the hilarity. “I want to be the first chick to s--t on the moon!” she cries to Nick as he rolls up the windows and leaves her behind. Lola is a feminist who’s not afraid to get grotesque.
#5 — Season 5, Episode 4
As the students learn about Shakespeare from their cool substitute teacher, Mr. Keating, Lola unsurprisingly excels in the class. We know she loves theater, and she even remarks that she “can’t turn down the spotlight” as she brilliantly recites Hamlet’s “to be or not to be” monologue with her own twists.
But by the end of the episode when Jessi rejects Nick, Lola voices, “Shakespeare would get a big ole British b--er for all this drama,” and she’s not wrong.
#4 — Season 4, Episode 5
In this 9/11-themed episode, one of the hardest lines to walk in comedy, we learn a big secret about Lola’s mom. “My mom’s ex-boyfriend died in 9/11,” Lola tells Jay. “Was he in one of the towers?” Jays asks. “No, he was flying one of the planes,” she says. “So… he was a pilot?” Jay asks, a faint glimmer of hope in his voice. “Kind of. Toward the end he was.” Woof, poor Lola.
#3 — Season 1, Episode 4
The iconic sleepover episode brings us an early glimpse into Lola’s inexplicable psyche. Fueled by jealousy over Devin welcoming Jessi into their friendship, she’s too distraught to think logically (does Lola ever think logically?).
So when Jessi offers to help fix things between Lola and Devin, a crying Lola asks her, “Wait, hold on, are you saying we should kill Devin, take her skin and wear it, and then blame the whole thing on Missy, or like what?” It’s a super goofy moment of comic relief.
#2 — Season 2, Episode 6
Lola and Andrew briefly date in Season 2 and things don’t work out as well as either of them would have liked. Both unafraid of their sexuality, Lola and Andrew seemed like a good match… until he dumped her.
“I thought you were a good guy, like Dr. Phil,” Lola shouts to him, “But you’re a bad guy like Dr. Oz!” We couldn’t have said it better ourselves, Lola.
#1 — Season 2, Episode 9
This Lola moment is one of her most sincere; even in her crass absurd way of saying things, it’s clear that Lola has some sort of wisdom and empathy.
“Touching boobs and rubbing fronts doesn't make you feel shitty. Mean jerks make you feel shitty,” Lola explains to Gina, comforting Gina after the student body turns on her. Lola naturally goes on to say, “We should feed all the mean jerks into a wood chipper and then spread their body CHONKS all over the playground so kids don't get hurt.”
We can never get enough of Lola, and we love seeing her come into her own even more in Season 5. Plus, her zingers seem to grow along with her as she becomes more self-aware and we understand why she is as kooky as she is.