You can't escape knowing a little something about 50 Shades of Grey at this point. It's a book that's spawned a movie franchise about two people have sex and engaging in some BDSM shenanigans that have spouted some controversy for being both bad descriptions of BDSM and masking an actually abusive relationship. And it's all based on Twilight, a teen vampire novel! Pop culture is weird.
If you've read them, you know the books are told from the perspective of Anastasia Steele, who is taught the joys of getting spanked by handsome billionaire Christian Grey. Author E.L. James announced awhile ago that she'd be retelling the story through Christian's eyes, for some reason. Well, the book is out and it's actually even weirder than the original.
Twitter user @scottygb pointed out how strangely focused Christian is on the raw chicken he and his girl are cooking than the raunchy sex they're about to have on the kitchen floor.
But oddly enough, people were into it:
Holy shit, the adherence to kitchen and food safety in this is admirable.— Philly Byrne (@PhilipNByrne) November 28, 2017
Switching off the gas is good practice but putting the chicken in the fridge seems quite excessive.— Jim Waterson (@jimwaterson) November 28, 2017
was the chicken already cooked? It sounds raw to me. Advisable to put it in the fridge.— Hayley Campbell (@hayleycampbell) November 28, 2017
Anastasia gazed into Christians eyes and whispered "I was worried about cross contamination" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 this thread is better than the book!— vik (@torie_pants) November 28, 2017
"I want you," hissed Christian as he sexily checked the CO2 fire extinguisher levels.— Philly Byrne (@PhilipNByrne) November 28, 2017
“Anastasia closed the fridge and glanced proudly at her Food Hygiene Level 1 Certificate, which was held securely in place by a Duff bottle opener magnet and a I ❤️ Mallorca one. ‘Can’t mess around with chicken’ she breathed sexually”.— Charlie Fairhead 🐝 (@TeaCider) November 28, 2017
I would drop trousers if someone emptied the bin before it smelled.— dreadfreegringa (@dreadfreegringa) November 28, 2017
Hey, someone who cleans the kitchen it hot, apparently!
But here's a twist. Christian can't cook.
How did he know what to do with chicken?! We'll have to wait for the follow up.