A few weeks ago I was playing a video game online when another player catcalled my female avatar. So, ladies, I get it. I completely understand your experience of getting cat called on the street. I am woke now.
I know exactly how stressful it is to have an elf with two swords riding a falcon ambush you with what he thinks are compliments. I know that trying to be nice back because you’re afraid he might get angry and launch a fireball at you and take your helmet that you spent weeks trying to get it. I also know the sheer relief when you open your social menu and click the mute button.
Turns out though some fellows have not had this very eye opening and very accurate experience. Maybe it’s because they don’t want to learn, or maybe it’s because they are filthy noobs who don’t even know the difference between a kobold and a troll. Whatever the case may be, take note gentlemen.
One time a guy in high school said he liked my smile and wanted to cum on my dimples. It was the first time we had met
2. Is it contagious?
“I’ve got Yellow Fever.”
…………………….ok? Ew. Stop. Don’t hit on me just because I’m Asian.
3. Get it? Because she is black!
When people call me milk chocolate, African princess, nubian queen. Like calm down
4. Maybe don't sexualize Jesus.
I’m a black chick with dreadlocks so I attract a lot of hoteps and weird “spiritual” old dudes. I’ve been told I look like “black Jesus” and “one of the original Hebrews–you know they were African. They don’t want you to know your history!!”
5. This may come as a surprise to you but...
Men who feel the need to point out how big my tits are. A guy that I saw around campus DM’ed me on instagram and said, “just thought you should know, you have some really big boobs.” No shit, they aren’t on my chest or anything.
6. I need a woman who can make a good knot.
“I like women like you. Cute, but not pretty.” Also, every time my family takes out our boat and puts it in the water i do the rope (pull it to the dock when it floats off the trailer). A man offers to help, i refuse, and then they comment on how amazing it is I was able to do that. Ive been doing it since I was 9, its not hard at all…
7. Two-thirds of a compliment sandwich
Any compliment that follows the “you sure are x for a y.” Such as, “you sure are pretty for a woman your age.” Or “you sure are smart for a girl.”
Just bad form all around.
8. How else are we supposed to know?
I think the best one recently is, “Oh, you don’t look like you’re Mexican”. “You’re so pretty for being Mexican”. Like what???? Am I supposed to have sombrero and mustache, orrrrrr???
9. You just seem so wifey.
“You’d make great wifey material” said by a guy who has never even met you.
10. Why do people keep bring up race.
“You’re hot for an Asian” and “I’ve always wanted to get with an Asian”
1) didn’t know Asians were universally ugly, and that I’m an exception
2) thanks for reducing me to a check mark on your bucketlist
11. He just means you are reliable.
“Damnnnn girl, you’re built like a Chevy truck!”. The fuck?
12. How do you drive? Don't your boobs get in the way?
“Oh wow, you do * insert normal activity * really good for a girl!”
13. So you can't see that you are pretty?
takes off glasses to clean them “You look pretty without glasses”
I appreciate being called pretty but I need my glasses to see.
14. Do compliments make you smile?
“You should smile more” Just tell me my smile is pretty
15. You are just adorable when I do awful things to you.
“You look really cute when you’re mad.”
Okay… I feel neither complimented nor less mad
16. Look out! We got a cannibal over here!
When a guy you just met makes lewd “compliments”, such as “I bet you taste great”
17. I bet you were really hot when you were young.
You look great for your age.
18. Why? Are you not a dog?
I don’t know if it’s meant as a compliment, but when a man calls me a ‘good girl’
19. Such a red head thing to say
Am redhead. Really sick of guys telling me they’re “super into redheads” or “I only date redheads.” Way to make me feel like that’s the only thing that matters about me for you…
20. I should know. I collect hair.
You look better with your hair down. You should always have it like that.
21. Now this is just lazy.
” you’re hot for whatever race you are”. tinder deleted
22. How'd they fit such a big brain inside that pretty head of yours?
After a woman does something really badass or something that demonstrates how smart she is…don’t immediately complement her looks, it’s not as nice as you may mean it to be!
23. Not okay!
Nice tits. I’m fifteen so that freaks me out.
24. This is offensive because it is redundant.
I got this one on OKCupid a few weeks ago: “You look okay for an average woman.”
25. Okay. I'll switch.
“A lesbian? But you’re so pretty, you could find a boyfriend real quick.”
26. You make it sound like negging doesn't work.
A guy desperate for attention: “Hey I noticed you have [insert flaw] … but it looks good on you!”
The flaw is usually something pretty obvious that others are aware of but too polite to bring up: like a massive scar, messed up teeth, or a slightly lazy eye.
Thanks, I’m aware of that particular feature and I try not to think about it or draw attention to it. Now my self-esteem is shot.
27. This dude will fight very hard to convince you he isn't racist.
“You’re too pretty to be Latina” and all of its variations. Dude, Latin America is full of beautiful women and also full of ugly women, just like any other part of the world. Insulting my ethnicity won’t get you anywhere…
28. I have had this exact thought.
I was wearing a form fitting dress and my boyfriend of the time said, “you look like a sexy sausage.”
There was a lot of explaining and backtracking afterwards.
29. Now she sits in the back row.
I’ve had a few instances of guys I barely talked to in a college class text me after the course has ended and told me how much they loved looking at my ass in class. like what. thats creepy.
30. No. You can't.
“You’re different than other women, I can tell because I can read people well.” – Something along these lines is said exclusively by “nice guys”.
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