Dolly Parton Updates "Jolene" to Celebrate Getting the COVID-19 Vaccine

Back in April 2020, country superstar Dolly Parton announced that she would be donating $1 million to Vanderbilt University for COVID research. Turns out that Dolly's donation helped fund Moderna's COVID-19 vaccine research, which has since been turned into successful vaccines that are helping millions today. It wouldn't be a stretch to say Dolly Parton saved us all!

When the internet found out about Dolly's good deed, they went ballistic. CNN reports that Dolly Parton's name "appear[ed] in the preliminary report on the vaccine among sponsors like the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, which Dr. Anthony Fauci heads, and Emory University." 

But only one of those sponsors also wrote "Jolene" and "I Will Always Love You" on the same day. 

When Dolly Parton appeared on TODAY  in April 2020 and was asked about her donation, she was amazingly humble, saying, "I'm just happy that anything I do can help somebody else."

The internet exploded with hyperbolic statements about how Dolly Parton saved us all and Dolly Parton is the only good rich person in the world. And yeah, these statements might be dramatic, but is anyone else doing it like Dolly?

We'd been up a creek without a paddle (going through a global pandemic without an effective leader and / or plan) for a while. It was about time someone took the wheel (of this boat, I guess, look, don't at me for mixing metaphors, you get what I'm saying) and steered us toward the shore (saved it). And we're all just so glad this person was Dolly Parton.

"Can we name it the Dolly Parton vaccine?" several people asked (sadly, Moderna did not listen to this very enticing point). "Dolly Parton is the one rich person we won't eat," another person asserted.

Others used Dolly's donation as a learning opportunity. "Let's be clear," one person wrote. "Dolly Parton is a millionaire and not a billionaire because she *keeps giving money away.* Being a billionaire is a MORAL FAILING. She gives away shockingly large amounts of money every year and is STILL RICHER THAN YOU AND I WILL EVER BE."

How many successful vaccine trials would we have if billionaires like Jeff Bezos and Bill Gates gave away tons of money? Maybe the pandemic would have ended back in November 2020! But Dolly Parton seems to be the only mega-wealthy public figure who's making a real difference here. 

For anyone singing "Jolene" on repeat this quarantine, how about "Vaccine, vaccine, vaccine?" Dolly was injected with the Moderna vaccine that she helped fund, bringing everything full circle. Fans are so glad this goddess is protected, and even more grateful she helped the path to everyone else getting protected as well.

Here's a look at her revised version of "Jolene": 

"Vaccine, vaccine, vaccine, vaccine, I'm begging of you please don't hesitate," she sang. "Vaccine, vaccine, vaccine, vaccine, 'cause once you're dead then that's a bit too late."

That's right. Dolly starred in an hour-long Christmas special and a Christmas musical on Netflix, in case you forgot that she is actually magical. 

From vaccine donations to good old southern charm, Dolly is truly a national treasure.